Via Memorius - Relegare Ira Reperire Caritas (2/5)
by Ashantai
Summary: Post-SAR; after Zack regains his memories, he sets off from seeing Max in Seattle to visit Jondy and Zane.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Relegare Ira, Reperire Caritas 

Author: Ashantai 

E-Mail: ashantai@hotmail.com 

Archive: Please ask! 

Pairings: No romantic pairings, just friendship/family ones 

Rating: PG-13 

Spoilers: Probably any episode Zack's ever appeared in, but I'm not sure... definitely Some Assembly Required. 

Summary: Follows my story "Via Memorius" - you should read that one first!! 

Disclaimer: I don't own Max, etc., or Dark Angel (I wish!!) but I like to watch them on tv. Please don't sue me for loving your show; I can't help it. :) 

  


This story is part 2 of the Via Memorius series. Click on my name to see the rest (they are numbered 1-4)

  
RELEGARE IRA, REPERIRE CARITAS 

The young man smoothed his spiked red hair into a more professionally-looking flatness and entered the service garage. It was a little classier than the one he'd worked at in Hollywood a year ago and Kansas for the past few months; this one had a television in the waiting room- it had a waiting room- and a small table with free coffee and cookies. He stepped up to the desk and the secretary- secretary?-, who was about his age, smiled at him shyly; he knew he was gorgeous, but right now what was important was getting this job. He had loads of experience, but there was no help wanted sign outside and mechanics could be surprisingly picky about who they worked with. One of the job interviews he'd had in the past had consisted of a fifty-two-year-old guy in dirty overalls asking him to take apart and reassemble a motorcycle engine in under four minutes. He'd done it, but the event had just served as one more piece of evidence that mechanics were weird people. Of course, some might argue that he himself was a lot weirder... 

"Reason for leaving last job?" the secretary asked, trying to sound professional but flushing slightly as he smiled broadly at her. 

"I accidentally punched through the wall of the garage when I didn't win the lottery," he told her. She laughed but he'd been serious; oh well, it was probably better that she didn't believe him. 

"Name?" she asked him next, grinning at him. 

"Alexander Roberts," he said, then flashed her a charming smile. "But you can call me Zane." She flushed crimson and took his resume from him, glancing over it. 

"Wait here for one moment, please..." she said. "Zane." Then she stood and walked into the back, where the boss must have been. Zane watched her go, already imagining what could happen between the two of them if he got this job. 

"Do not attempt to adjust your set," a voice suddenly broke through the daytime television droning from behind him. He turned and looked at the screen and saw a man's eyes, with bars of red, white and blue on the top and bottom of the screen, and the words 'STREAMING FREEDOM VIDEO' rolling across them. Zane was immediately all ears; this was the man and the exact type of broadcast that had forced him to leave his home in Hollywood a year ago. Then, it said his position, as well as those of three of his sisters and one brother, had been compromised and Lydecker was onto them. He'd gotten away, as he could only assume the others had, and now, in Santa Fe, he braced himself for what the 'freedom video' would say this time. 

"This is a streaming freedom video bulletin," the voice of the eyes continued. "The cable hack cannot be traced, it cannot be stopped, and it is the only free voice left in this city. New information has come to light about the Project Manticore Facility." Zane held his breath. "Manticore-trained doctors and scientists have been performing covert procedures on prisoners involving mind control, employing techniques such as exposure to propaganda and subliminal messages, torture, and psychological manipulation. All this is done in order to turn the prisoner into an obedient slave ready to do Manticore's bidding. Recently, a failed attempt on the life of a high official in the Eyes Only informant net was carried out by one such prisoner." An image of the Manticore chimera symbol appeared on the screen, and the caption 330417291559 scrolled underneath it. Zane's heart nearly stopped; that was Zack's _barcode._ What was this guy saying, that Zack had been captured, reprogrammed... turned? It couldn't be, that was impossible! But Zane had left three messages on Zack's contact mailbox over the last year, two of which had been important, but his brother hadn't phoned him... Zane swallowed hard as the transmission on the television continued. 

"Members of the Manticore staff have perpetrated crimes against this individual; but he has escaped you. And now, the tables have been turned: Manticore wants you dead for the information you have. Only you know how to reverse the wrongs that have been done to this man. This message is going straight to you, right out of Seattle and across the United States. Eyes Only knows who you are, and you will be punished. Come forward, and a deal may still be possible." 

The secretary came back into the room, grinning, looking down at Zane's resume as she went to tell him that he'd gotten an interview. She looked up, but her smile fell away and was replaced by confusion and distress as she surveyed the empty waiting room. Outside, a truck revved its engine and tore into the road and out of sight. 

  
Zack stopped at a payphone outside of Seattle, almost smiling as he thought of Max, who would probably be at a similar payphone herself soon, calling the contact number he had finally given her. As he'd written to her, he knew how much having that number would mean to her, and he liked the thought of having made her happy. A thought at the back of his mind told him that it could be a mistake, but Zack had decided that the possibly of a breach in security was an acceptable tactical risk. 

As Zack took a quarter out of his pocket and lifted the receiver of the telephone, he caught sight of a television behind the glass of an electronics shop, showing live news coverage of police officers gathered around the entrance to an old, run-down apartment building. He swallowed as the camera panned to two paramedics pushing a stretcher away from the building with a body bag on top of it. Zack looked away. 

He'd had to kill Alyssa, he knew, and the soldier part of him stood by his decision to do so. But the other, less apparent part, the human side of him, had known Alyssa, had considered her a friend. Of course, all the memories between them had occurred when he'd believed himself to be Adam, but still... she'd been kind to him, helped him uncover his true identity and remember everything that had happened to him. It wasn't fair to her that he'd killed her; it wasn't fair to him that he'd had to. She'd known too much: that Zack was alive and well, where Alec and Max lived... Manticore could have easily gotten to her; she was a gentle woman, and would have been susceptible to an interrogation. But even so... he just wished he hadn't had to do it. 

Zack shook his guilty thoughts away; what was done was done, and now because of his decision- which he still believed to be right- Max would be safe. And Alec, though he cared less about him since he hadn't been protecting him for over ten years, and nor did he grow up with him. And, of course, Zack himself would be safe, something he took comfort in only because it would mean the others' safety as well. 

He dialled the number he'd given Max and before his brief message could finish punched in the twelve-digit code to give him access to the mailbox. It had taken him several hours of wracking his brain to remember it, but finally he had because it was made up of select numbers of each of his twelve escaped siblings' barcodes in a random order. 

"To record a new greeting, press 1," the automatic voice of the mailbox droned. Zack tapped his fingers impatiently on the base of the payphone. "To listen to new messages, press 2." Zack hit the two and waited. 

"You have seven new messages," the voice told him; Zack's face paled. "If at any time you would like to repeat a message-" Zack hit the one to listen to the first message. 

"Zack, it's me." 

  
_Zack walked stealthily through the foliage, over logs and debris, holding a semi-automatic in his hands and seeing his breath in the cold darkness of the forest around him. The little girl walking just behind him stopped at a motion of his hand, along with the other two children with them. He turned to them and made some signals of direction. Ben and Jace nodded, heading off to take up flanking positions as they moved in on the objective. The child before him gazed up at him with a sweet face and watched attentively as he instructed her with hand movements as well. The moonlight caught in her half-inch fuzz of blonde hair and Zack smiled down at her with love before continuing through the trees, the little girl walking obediently behind him, her machine gun ready._

  
Syl; she was close to tears. 

"God, I hope you get this message. I'm so worried about you." Her voice shook. "I tried to get to you, but... the X7s- there were too many of them. I'm sorry. I hope you're alright. Krit and I got out okay, so don't worry. We know about Max, Lydecker told us... I can't believe she's gone. Our little sister..." Now she was crying. "Zack, please escape and get this message. Call me; I'm back in Sacramento. 916-555-1297. And Zack... Max wasn't your fault. Don't think that, okay? I love you." 

"1:02pm, Sunday, May 24th, 2020," the automated voice stated after the message had finished. Two days after the assault on Manticore. He'd have to call her and tell her Max was alive, and that he was okay. He pressed the button that would bring him to the next message. 

"Hey Zack." 

  
_"Tell Ben to stop yelling," the little boy said fearfully, sitting down next to Zack. "The guards will hear him." Zack turned and looked toward the window Ben had climbed out of, seeing Max staring out of it. He frowned. _

"What did we do wrong?" They heard Ben's voice scream from the High Place. Zack looked at the boy next to him and touched his shoulder. 

"He's sad about Jack," Zack told him, just managing to keep back the shake in his voice. He was sad about Jack, too. The child looked up at him. 

"Make him stop yelling," he said again, in a smaller voice. "Or I'll beat him up." He was hiding his fear with toughness, as always. Zack turned to tell Max he wanted Ben back inside, but the sirens suddenly broke the silence of the night. The little boy next to him covered his ears as though in pain, his eyes filled with both anger and fear. 

"Go back to bed, now!" Zack called to Max, motioning for the rest of the children who were up to do the same. All but the child beside him scampered away quickly, climbing between their blankets and closing their eyes. Zack, worried, gazed toward the window, knowing that he couldn't leave most of his siblings alone in order to save one brother already in the process of being apprehended. The boy sitting on Zack's bed hesitated for a moment, looking out the window. He started to stand, fists clenched, but instead shivered suddenly as Ben's voice stopped screaming from the roof and the yard outside was flooded with an unholy light. 

  
Krit; his always-gentle but tough voice was pained. 

"I'm okay, so is Syl. I'm sure she's called you. I still can't really accept that Max is dead, but Lydecker told us she was. I hope he was lying. Anyway, when you get out and get this- because I know you'll get out, Zack- I just wanted to tell you that I love you, and Max dying wasn't your fault, alright? So call me. I'm in Great Falls, at 406-555-7644. Bye." Zack was unsettled by this message, almost identical to Syl's. How had his brother and sister known that he would blame himself for Max's death? The answer was, of course, because he blamed himself for _everything_ negative that happened to his siblings, but Zack didn't want to dwell on that. 

"11:19am, Monday, May 25th, 2020," he was told. He clicked the one to hear the next message. 

"Zack, hi." 

  
_"... and then all the children in the castle got away, and they went out into the Real World and they were very, very happy." For once it was Tinga trying her hand at a story, and though Ben had been slightly put out at first he was enjoying it now. "And the evil king never found them, because they were too smart." _

The children sitting around her smiled at each other, pleased that this story had been much nicer than most of Ben's. Brin looked at Tinga, two sets of dark eyes meeting, one thoughtful and one cheerful. 

"That was a wonderful story," Brin, always ready to compliment, to love, said in her sweet voice. Next to her, a little girl was grinning at Tinga, her blue eyes wide with fascination at what she'd just heard. 

"It was great," she said happily in a high voice. She looked at Zack, meaningfully. "And one day it will happen." 

"One day," Zack agreed. 

"If we're good soldiers," Ben added solemnly. Zack looked at him. 

"We're good soldiers already." 

"Maybe the Real World is the Good Place," the blue-eyed girl suggested. Before Ben could say what he undoubtedly would say, Zack stood. 

"Time for bed," he said. All the children stood except Max and the other girl; Zack knew they didn't sleep. He gazed down at them, frowning and starting to tell them to go to bed anyway, but the older girl looked up at him and smiled sweetly. Zack's frown fell away, and as he looked at her he decided that there was no real harm in them staying up. He left them there, playing and whispering together, two happy little sisters, and climbed into his own bed contentedly. 

  
Jondy; she sounded frightened. 

"I need to see you." Zack held his breath. "I think Lydecker's onto me, but I heard Manticore was gone, so I don't get it. Anyway, there have been some guys following me around for almost a week. They haven't tried anything yet, but I'm a little nervous. Can you come to Austin? I just hope you're close..." She added quickly, "I gotta go. I'll wait for your call. 512-555-3864. Bye, Zack." His breath caught, his hands started shaking. Jondy. Jondy had needed him- when? And he hadn't been there. 

"3:13pm, Friday, July 17th, 2020," the automated voice said. _Oh God!_ Zack panicked. _Almost seven months ago!_ She had needed him almost seven months ago and he had never called; he'd been stuck in Manticore and Jondy had been in trouble! Zack hit one to hear the next message, dreading what it might reveal next. 

"Zack!" 

  
_"Do you think the stars are bigger up there?" a little boy, his face without its usual smile as he gazed up through the window at the sky. _

"Why would they be bigger?" Zack asked, looking at him. They were sitting on their beds in the quiet barracks. 

"I don't know." The boy shrugged. "One of the nurses said that they're actually huge balls of fire. Did you know that, Zack?" 

"She was just kidding," Zack said, because he didn't know. It sounded like a joke to him. 

"Oh," the child took this as fact, as everything Zack said was to his siblings. He stared at the stars. "Well, whatever they are, they're pretty," the boy said softly. Zack smiled down at him, nodded. 

"Yeah." 

"Zack?" 

"Yes?" 

"I love you," the boy said; he had always been a child who could easily express his emotions, though the guards and the nurses- and most of all Lydecker- discouraged emotions. 

"Me, too," Zack said, laying a hand briefly on his bald head in affection. 

"The nurses told me a joke today." He was always getting those and retelling them to his siblings, though they didn't always understand them, and neither did he. "Wanna hear?" 

"Sure," Zack said, putting an arm around the child and gazing up at the peaceful sky. 

  
Zane; he was excited. 

"I need to talk to you. I think I've met the one! You know, _the one?_ I think we're going to get married, bro! I love her so much... her name's Vanessa. Isn't that a great name, Vanessa? Call me- I'm in Kansas. My number's..." Zane's voice got quieter as he moved his face away from the phone. "What's the area code here, baby?" A female voice said something, and he spoke into the receiver again, "505-555-2948. Anyway, I'll talk to you, man." There was a click, and Zack rolled his eyes at this message; his 'greeting' specifically said that this mailbox was to be used for _emergencies._ Zane; he never changed. God, Zack loved him. 

"12:07pm, Tuesday, July 21st, 2020," the automated voice told him. Zack pressed the button. 

"Zack, it's Zane again." He sounded worried. "Where are you, man? I got a call from Jondy yesterday, don't know how she found me. Anyway, she's scared pretty bad. I'm in New Mexico, so I went over to Texas where she's living. There were some guys following her- she said she called you but you never showed? That's not like you; what's going on? She and I are going to stay together in Santa Fe until we hear from you, okay? If that doesn't make you call, I don't know what will. Tactical exposure and all that. Phone us, bro. Bye." But the phone didn't click off, and Zane came back onto the line. He sounded sheepish. "Oh, and don't worry about my last message. Vanessa's gone. We... well, never mind. Just call. Same number as last time, 505-555-2948." He disconnected. 

"12:29am, Wednesday, July 29th, 2001." Zack moved on to the next message. 

"Zack, you're scaring us! Where are you?" Jondy sounded terrified; her voice was shaking. "We're okay, me and Zane, we're not in any trouble, but we're worried about you. Why haven't you been returning our calls? I really needed you in Austin, where were you? I-" She choked on her words as her tears started. 

"Give me the phone, Jondy," Zack heard Zane's gentle voice in the background. After a moment his brother came on the line. "Look, this isn't funny, man. Where are you? Call us, please. Same number as before, in Santa Fe." There was a short pause, and then Zane said softly, "I love you, Zack." He hung up, and Zack closed his eyes briefly at the painful message. _I'm so sorry,_ he thought, a lump gathering in his throat. He should have been there! But at least Jondy was okay, though he didn't like the idea of them still being together. It was tactical exposure, just as Zane had joked. But it wasn't a joke, Zack knew. Not to him. 

"5:23pm, Thursday, December 10th, 2020," the voice told him. Zack punched the button impatiently. 

"Zack, it's Krit," his little brother's voice came through to him. "I haven't heard from you, but I'm sure you must be out of Manticore by now..." He swallowed hard. "I'm just calling to let you know I'm leaving Great Falls. I've got an apartment lined up in Helena, with a view of the mountains. It's going to be great! You should come visit, when... Well, when you're ready. I'm sure you have a lot to do." He cleared his throat. "Anyway, the number there's 406-555-9600; I'll be moved into the place in about a week. I'll see you soon." 

"7:15pm, Wednesday, January 11th, 2021," the automated voice said; two weeks ago. Zack hit the button again. 

"There are no new messages. To repeat-" Zack hung up the receiver, stood there for a moment, emotions churning in his head: guilt, relief, sorrow, pain, grief, anger, love... Then his face hardened in determination as he climbed onto his motorcycle. Now he had a specific destination, a mission; he revved the engine and headed for Santa Fe.


	2. Chapter 2

For pairings, rating, disclaimer, etc., please refer back to Chapter 1. 

  
RELEGARE IRA, REPERIRE CARITAS 

Jondy drank the last of her water, sighed, and turned the page of the novel she was reading. Well, skimming was more like it; it wasn't a very good book and she was distracted. Jondy couldn't remember the last time she had smiled; _really_ smiled. She was too worried to be happy anymore; her big brother, who had always looked out for her- for all of her siblings- was missing. Maybe even... but she didn't want to think about that. She glanced outside; the late winter wind was blowing dead leaves about the front yard, spraying the light rain gently against the windows of Zane's truck, parked in the driveway of the little two-bedroom house they were renting here in Santa Fe. 

The problem was, she didn't know which would be better: Zack dead or recaptured. She knew that he would never want to go back there, but according to Zane, who had seen Zack six months previously, Zack had already been taken back to Manticore once. Jondy hadn't seen her big brother since she was fourteen years old; when Zane first told her, she hadn't believed that he would have allowed himself to be recaptured and dragged back to that place. He always said he'd rather die than go back there. But Zane had said that he'd allowed himself to be taken to protect Max, and that she could believe. Jondy almost smiled at the thought of her littlest sister; Max had been her best friend growing up, and Jondy had thought she was dead all these years because the last time she had seen her was during the escape from Manticore, when Max had fallen through some thin ice and disappeared. After Jondy got out into the world, she mourned her little sister. But now she knew: Max was fine after all, and that thought comforted her greatly. 

Right now, Jondy needed any comfort she could get. Zack was missing, maybe dead. He hadn't returned any of hers or Zane's calls over the past year, and with no other way to get in touch with him or any of the others, they had very little answers. It was horribly frustrating; Jondy was trying to get on with her life, as Zane said she should, because she knew that moping around waiting for the off-chance that Zack might come back wouldn't help anyone. Jondy suspected that Zane had already given up on Zack, moved on. He hadn't said it, but whenever she mentioned Zack she saw it in his eyes; he believed their brother was dead, and that scared her more than anything her imagination could ever come up with. 

Other than that, however, Zane was Jondy's biggest consolation. They had been staying together ever since she'd tracked him down in New Mexico to help her out in Austin, after Zack hadn't shown up or returned her call. There had been some suspicious men following her around for a few days there, and though she had heard Manticore was gone, she'd been afraid. At the time, she'd figured Zack had been too busy to come, and so had tracked down Zane to help her instead. He'd gotten her out of there, and for a while she'd expected to get Zack's belated call, asking if she was alright in the voice he always used with his siblings- gruff, but with deep, unarguable love just below the surface. Only now, after almost a year with nothing from her big brother, Jondy feared the worse. 

"Hello!" a voice called from the door of the small house. Jondy smiled, put her book down, and stood up from the sofa. A moment later Zane entered the room. He threw her a grin as he took his wet jacket off, tossing it over the back of an easy chair. Jondy picked it up and threaded it onto a hanger, putting it neatly away in the closet. Zane didn't seem to notice; he fell onto the sofa in the way that young men did, and Jondy smiled and rolled her eyes, taking a seat beside him. 

"Did you get it?" she asked. He looked at her, confusion briefly crossing his face. 

"Oh," he said, once he'd realized what she meant. He waved a hand at her, dismissing the idea. "I left before I found out." 

"What?" She stared at him incredulously. "Why would you do that? We need the money, Zane, and you said that job was a sure thing." 

"It is. I'll go back there tomorrow." He grinned at her. "I'll tell the secretary I had a medical emergency or something." 

"Why did you leave?" she asked curiously. His expression became serious. 

"I saw something. An Eyes Only broadcast." 

"Eyes Only?" Jondy repeated, gazing into space for a moment. 

  
_"Do not attempt to adjust your sets." Jondy had ignored the voice from the television when it had come over the broadcast over a year before. She was in San Francisco, living in a nice little two-bedroom apartment with a friend, with a view of the bay and the Golden Gate Bridge, not so golden anymore since the Pulse. But still it was home, and she was happy there. _

"This is a streaming freedom video bulletin. This cable hack is being beamed to you right across America. It cannot be traced, it cannot be stopped." 

"Jondy, did you borrow my red skirt?" her roommate asked, coming out of her bedroom to stand in front of Jondy, her hands placed firmly on her hips. Jondy glanced up from the book she was reading and shook her head. 

"Sorry, Yin, I haven't seen it." 

"What's this?" the girl asked after a moment of disappointment, motioning to the television. Jondy shrugged but glanced over at it. A man's eyes bordered by red, white, and blue stripes with 'STREAMING FREEDOM VIDEO' scrolling across them filled the screen. 

"... for those known as X5," the voice of the eyes was saying. She froze, her heart catching in her throat. Yin left the room again, muttering about her skirt, but Jondy was riveted to the television. For a moment she thought that she'd heard it wrong, but 'X5' and then the Manticore chimera symbol appeared between the bars of red, white, and blue. Next, scrolling across it, five barcodes. Zane's, Tinga's, Syl's, Krit's... and her own. Her hands began shaking. 

"You've been compromised," the voice continued. Jondy swallowed hard, heart racing. "You're in danger. You know what to do." Jondy closed her eyes briefly as the barcodes began to scroll across the screen once again, and glanced down the hallway, gazing at Yin's closed door. 

"I repeat: you've been compromised. You know what to do," the voice said again. "This message will repeat every hour on the hour until each of you has checked in." God! _Jondy thought, panicked._ How long has it been playing already? They might burst through the door any second! _She just hoped that her brothers and sisters had escaped already. Who would have compromised them? She had a horrible feeling that it could be no one but one of her siblings, caught and tortured for information by Manticore... she shook the painful thought away. I have to focus! she berated herself. _

Jondy's eyes spilled over with tears as she rose slowly from the sofa. There was no time to gather anything from her bedroom, so she simply grabbed her coat and wallet, wiping angrily at her tears. There was no use crying about it; this was her life. She would always be looking over her shoulder, always running to maintain her freedom. Don't cry. _She headed for the door of her little apartment, hesitating for a moment in the doorway as she surveyed the cozy living room and kitchen, where dinner was simmering on the stove. _

"Jondy?" she heard Yin's voice calling her from down the hall. Quickly shutting the door noiselessly behind her, she left San Francisco forever. 

  
"Yeah, remember, like the one that told us to move out last year?" Zane was asking her. 

"I remember," she said softly. He had her full attention now. "What did it say this time?" She liked Santa Fe; she didn't want to leave. Besides, she still didn't understand how that Eyes Only person had gotten her barcode in the first place. But, of course, she'd still listened and gotten the hell out of San Francisco, hoping desperately that her likewise endangered siblings had escaped unscathed as well. Now she knew that Zane had, but she still thought about the others frequently, and she just hoped that they were okay. But now that Zack was gone, she didn't know if she'd ever find out whether or not they were safe, or even how many got out that night besides her. Zack had never said. 

"It was about Zack," Zane's soft voice cut through her thoughts. 

"What did it say?" she asked quickly. 

"You might want to brace yourself, Jondy," he said gently. Her heart quickened; she swallowed. He was looking at her like he had to tell her something horrible and really didn't want to. 

"Tell me," she said firmly, preparing herself for the worst. 

"It was a broadcast out of Seattle. Eyes Only said that Zack had been recaptured by Manticore- he didn't use his name, just flashed his barcode. He said that Zack had been put through... procedures. So he would talk, tell them where we are, probably. And then they sent him like some kind of assassin to kill someone who works for Eyes Only. But he failed, and escaped Manticore. But the guy said something about lasting damage that still needed to be fixed. I don't know. He seemed to be calling for the doctors from Manticore to help. Now that Manticore's gone, I wouldn't be surprised if the ones who are still alive are already out of the country by now. I don't know if he'll be able to get Zack help... I don't even know why he wants to help Zack at all." Zane sounded frustrated, which was exactly how Jondy felt, on top of sick to her stomach. Her brother shrugged. "But he seems to. It's just-" He paused, lowered his voice. "I wish that I knew what's wrong with Zack. The transmission was vague; it was obvious he was speaking to specific people." He sighed. "I'm just not sure what it all means." When he'd finished, Jondy exhaled in one long breath, half-devastated and half-relieved. Zack was alive, but Manticore had captured him. He was free, but he they had done something terrible to him. She was angry, frustrated; she wished she knew what had happened, could help him... she wished she could even just get in touch with him, for God's sake! 

"...again," Zane's was saying, cutting through her thoughts. 

"What?" she stammered. 

"I said I'm calling the contact number again," he repeated, smiling at her gently. She nodded, and he walked over to the telephone on the endtable beside the sofa, picking up the receiver and dialling the number from memory. He turned away from her as he recorded his message, and she frowned; it annoyed her that he was so protective sometimes. But it mostly annoyed her that his overprotectiveness only made her love him more. It was nice to be treated like a child sometimes, even if she was a little older than him. To be coddled, loved, protected... once in a while, it really was nice. 

Jondy watched him record the message, gazing at his strong shoulders and the way he held himself: heavily, tensely. He'd been under a lot of stress lately, what with having to rescue her in Texas and now this whole ordeal with Zack, though he usually laughed off his fatigue. Jondy herself didn't need to sleep, but lately she'd been wishing that she could lie down in a bed, close her eyes and not open them again for a good eight or nine hours. The most she could ever really accomplish was two, and then her body would start itching for movement and she had to get up. It was very frustrating, because when she was awake she could only ever think of Zack and her other siblings. 

  
_"Jondy?" Max was calling her as if from far away. The sound was all muddled, both with her own grogginess and Max's panicked tears. Slowly, Jondy's eyes fluttered open and registered that she was in the forest around Manticore, lying on her back, and in a lot of pain. She was momentarily blinded by the summer sun as her eyes focussed, and she quickly raised a hand to shield herself from it. But even that brief movement sent waves of nausea and dizziness shooting through her body, and she blacked out again. Time passed lazily. _

"Jondy!" Max; sadness, pain, fear. 

"BP is 75 and falling." 

"Ok, we've got internal hemorrhaging. Prep for surgery. We're going to need some blood in here." 

"Jondy!" Zack; curtness, authority, love. 

"Get them out of here right now!" A harsh voice. A scuffling sound, the clatter of something. A cool touch on her forehead; Zack's hand. "Sir, we need you in here!" Someone rushing into the room. 

"Is she going to be okay or not?" An angry voice shaking with concern; Zack. 

"Back to the barracks, 599." Lydecker; Jondy shivered even in her groggy state at the sound of his voice. The sound of someone struggling, a yell of pain. Lydecker's angry yell, "Get him to solitary now!" 

"Zack!" Max's voice; high, panicked. More struggling; a door slamming shut. 

"You- 452." Lydecker again. "Over here." Someone walking reluctantly across a linoleum floor. "I'm going to need three units of blood." Then nothing. The passage of time, how long she didn't know. 

"Jondy... Jondy..." A sweet, loving voice calling her, glowing with warm affection and the shake of fear. Jondy's eyes slowly opened, focussed under the harsh flourescent lights. She turned her head slightly, surveying the room around her; slowly different objects came into view: medical tools, steel furniture, a bloody jacket thrown haphazardly against a chair... two children standing before her. 

"Zack..." Her throat felt like sandpaper. "Max..." 

"Don't speak," her sister said gently, taking her limp hand. Jondy looked down at herself; there were three bullet-holes smattered across the area just below her collar bones. Her hands started shaking. 

"What-" 

"It doesn't matter." Max laid a cool hand on her forehead. "You're safe now." 

"My tummy hurts," she whispered. Max turned their brother worriedly, but Zack just smiled gently down at Jondy. 

"Don't worry, baby sister," he said softly. Jondy heard footsteps outside, turned her head sharply in fear, felt a sickening sense of vertigo overtake her at the movement, struggled against unconsciousness, focussed on Max's soothing fingers on her face. Zack hurried to the door, peered out slowly around the corner. He motioned to Max; she nodded, turned back to Jondy and smiled, then leaned down and pressed a kiss to her forehead softly. 

"Sleep," she said. 

"I don't need-" Jondy began, but as Zack and Max headed stealthily out the door the sounds of the rooms dulled out, her eyes fluttered closed, and everything went black. 

  
"Jondy?" Zane was standing in front of her. He had refilled her glass of water and she took it thankfully, sipping at it. He sat down next to her and yawned. They sat there for a while, not speaking, each lost in their own thoughts. Zane glanced over at his sister. Her blue eyes were pensive, her blonde hair hung loosely against her shoulders; he detected the faintest of dark circles under her eyes. 

  
_Jondy was eight years old. She gripped the steering wheel of the hummer tightly and tossed a grin at the boy next to her without the guards around them seeing. Zane, just barely younger than she was, smiled back, then turned to see the five other military vehicles around them, carrying ten of their siblings broken into pairs. They had all been excited for weeks about this exercise; Zane had never driven before outside the simulator. Jondy hadn't either, though that didn't worry him. Not too much, anyway. _

"Go!" one of the men said, hitting the hood of the car and signalling that they could leave. Simultaneously, the five hummers shot forward as their child drivers pressed too hard on the gas pedals. Zane felt his heart catch in his throat for a moment and glanced over at Jondy. 

"Don't worry," she said in a voice that made it obvious she was having fun. She slowed the car a bit as she got the hang of it and Zane relaxed slightly. But he was still a bit too cautious to completely settle down; this was nothing like the simulator. Besides, they had an objective to concentrate on, and he wanted to be alive when they got to it. 

"Tinga, Krit, flank my position," Zack's voice came over the comm headsets they were wearing. "Syl, Jondy, break off with Ben and circle in behind." Jondy turned the wheel, and the car lurched to the side as they moved sharply to the left. Zane threw her an exasperated look; she glanced at him sheepishly but she was having a lot of fun, he could tell. He smiled at her as they drove in spite of his fears and chuckled to himself. He always liked to see her happy. 

  
Zane sighed and Jondy looked up at him, forcing a smile. 

"What?" she asked. 

"Just thinking." 

"About...?" He shrugged at this and said nothing. She nodded. "Me too." 

"At least he's alive," Zane said; a small smile graced Jondy's lips. 

"I never doubted it," she answered softly. 

"Always the optimist," he noted, flashing a grin at her. 

  
_"You're a good brother, Zack," Jondy said as they walked along the corridors of Manticore, their siblings behind them. She touched his tense arm. "It's not your fault." _

"I shouldn't have given her that order." They were clutching Max's arms protectively, holding her slumped form between them, her body still convulsing slightly. Jondy was worried about her, but the thought of finally getting out was exhilarating. Max had been Zack's motivation to finally do it; Jondy had suspected something like that would happen since Max' seizures had been getting progressively worse over the last few months and Zack had been getting progressively on edge. 

"She wasn't ready," Zack said in a pained voice. Jondy looked up at him, a soft smile touching her lips. He was such a very good brother; she loved him so much. 

"Where's Eva?" Jace asked as she came up beside them; Jondy frowned at her question. Jace hadn't been there when Eva had died, so she wouldn't know how hurtful her question would be to Zack. But still, it upset Jondy that she'd asked it and she quickly turned to Zack, seeing the pain expression on his face. Eva had been one of Zack's most trusted soldiers; she'd been the only one, besides Jondy herself, whom Zack felt he could always depend on in a pinch. But more importantly, she had been his sister, and he loved her. 

"Gone," Jondy whispered quickly to Jace, hoping Zack wouldn't hear though he was right beside her and they all had excellent hearing. Tears threatened to spill over Jace's eyes at this. Jondy touched her shoulder as she saw Ben come up to walk beside Zack, and Jace smiled weakly at her. 

"Don't worry, Zack, she's in the Good Place." Jondy winced when Ben said that; it was the worst thing he could have possibly said to Zack at this moment. 

"Ben, don't." Their big brother waved him away and the boy's always-hopeful face fell. "Don't talk about the Good Place, it's not real. We're not little anymore." Jondy opened her mouth to say something to remedy the situation, but stopped herself. 

"It's real!" Ben's voice was filled with anger to hide his pain. 

"Go and walk with Tinga," Zack ordered; Ben all but stomped to the back of the group, and Jondy sighed to herself. She reached forward and tugged on Zack's sleeve. 

"What now, Jondy?" he asked. He was trying not to cry, she could tell. She smiled softly at him. 

"Right then, Zack, you weren't a good brother," she said gently, gazing at him. He'd known that, she'd just had to tell him. All their lives she had taken it upon herself to remind Zack that he was a person if he started acting like he was only a soldier. 

"Ben, come here," he said, looking at Jondy. She smiled, nodded, and Ben reluctantly rejoined them, his eyes still angry and pained. Zack said gently, "Tell us a story," and Ben's face virtually glowed with happiness. Slowly, as his brother began speaking, Zack smiled. It was only then, with her duty done, that Jondy turned away to cry over her dead sister. 

  
Zane's dog entered the living room, a little German Shepard puppy that Jondy tolerated only because he seemed to love it so much. Well, not it- her. And she had a name: Wenna. Jondy had to admit it was a sweet name, and she was a sweet dog, but she wasn't looking forward to when Wenna grew up, because then she would remind Jondy of the frightening dogs they had at Manticore. 

  
_"Make them stop!" Jace clapped her small hands over her ears as the dogs barked harshly, her dark eyes welling up with tears. She was four years old. _

"It's okay," Jondy said, touching her shoulder. She was only a few months older than Jace, and scared too, but Jace was scared of a lot more things than most of the other children ever were. It worried Zack, Jondy knew, because it was a weakness almost as great as the seizures and Manticore didn't deal well with flaws. Jondy wished she could shoot the horrible dogs for Jace, make her little sister feel better, but this was a no-weapons exercise. 

"Go away," Jondy said firmly to the two dogs closing on them, putting a protective arm around Jace. The dogs growled fiercely. "Go away," Jondy repeated, her voice hard. She kept eye-contact with the German Shepards, not breaking it before they did, as she'd been taught to do. Only then did they back away, and she smiled, satisfied. Jace slowly calmed down as the dogs moved off, and she and Jondy hurried to rejoin Zack and the rest of their unit. 

  
Wenna scampered over to Jondy and licked her hand, breaking her out of her reverie. She jumped slightly, then smiled and scratched the dog behind the ears. Zane yawned; she looked at him. He always did this, stayed up until he was practically falling over because he thought he should be a good host or something. Host? God, she was his sister, not some posh guest visiting from afar and expecting things. She wore her pajamas around the house most of time, so she had no idea where he had gotten that idea. But that was Zane's way; always friendly, always considerate and accommodating. But Jondy never slept, and of course he knew that. Didn't he get it? He would never be able to stay up long enough. Maybe it was a macho thing. She smiled at the humour of it as he yawned again, loudly. 

"Go to bed," she said to her little brother. He started to protest, then shrugged. He touched her arm. 

"It's going to be okay, you know," he said gently. She nodded and smiled at him. 

"I know." 

"Goodnight, Jondy." 

"Goodnight, Zane," she said softly as he stood. 

"Come on, Wenna," he coaxed the puppy. "Let's go to bed." The dog left her side and trotted obediently after him toward the stairs. Jondy turned to look outside for a moment, watched the wind push the leaves around the deserted street, and the rivers that the film of light rain made on the windows travelling lazily down the glass, and reached for her book. But before she could reopen it and start reading again, the telephone rang. Zane paused on the stairs as she stood and headed for the endtable. _Who would be calling now? It has to be at least one in the morning._ She picked up the phone as both she and Zane held their breaths without realizing they were doing so. 

"Hello?" she asked. 

"Jondy?" a husky male voice came over the line. "Is that you?" Jondy clutched the receiver tightly in her hands; her eyes fluttered closed and tears spilled down her cheeks. Zane sat down heavily, disbelievingly, on the stairs. 

"Yes, it's me," she breathed into the receiver, the most incredible feeling of relief she'd ever had in her life sweeping through her being. "Zack, thank God you're alive."


	3. Chapter 3

For pairings, rating, disclaimer, etc., please refer back to Chapter 1. 

  
RELEGARE IRA, REPERIRE CARITAS 

"Zack, thank God you're alive," his little sister's sweet voice whispered over the phone, shaking with tears. Zack closed his eyes momentarily and breathed an inward sigh of relief at the sound of Jondy's voice, not knowing how happy he would really be to hear it until he did. 

  
_"Zack, get up." _

"I'm sleeping." 

"Get up, get up!" 

"Go away." 

"Zack..." A poke on his shoulder; he opened his eyes. The seven-year-old grinned at him, giggling into her hands as her blue eyes sparkled. 

"Jondy, go away already." She was being a pest, which she often was- but this was one of the few days the guards were letting them sleep in, and Zack intended to take advantage of it. He was nine. 

"We're bored," Jondy said of herself and Max, who waved cheerfully at him from her bed across the room. Zack groaned, picked up his pillow and clamped it over his head, rolling onto his stomach and wishing not for the first time that they would just go to sleep for more than an hour at least once- like right about now. 

"Go play with her, then," he muttered into his mattress. He felt Jondy climb up onto his back and she reached her hands down, tickling him. Zack yelled in surprise and bolted upright, tumbling her onto the floor. She blinked, then giggled, unharmed and happy to see him awake. Zack yawned loudly. 

"You got him up!" Max called over happily; Zack looked at her, then down at the girl before him, who was gazing at him mischievously from the floor beside his bed. 

"Come play with us," she said in her cheerful little-girl voice. Zack rolled his eyes and threw his blankets back, knowing that he would never be able to get back to sleep now. He followed her over to Max's bed, feigning annoyance, but a small smile touched his lips as he watched the little girl in front of him scurrying toward her sister with excitement. 

  
"I'm fine, Jondy," he said gently, smiling to himself at the memory. 

"Where are you?" she asked. Zack glanced around the shabby, cheap motel room he was staying in for the night. 

"I'm in Arizona- Red Mesa, it's right on the Utah border," he told her. "I should be in Santa Fe early tomorrow afternoon." 

"Really?" She sounded so happy; he was glad that the shake was now completely gone from her voice. And though he didn't say so, he was couldn't wait to see her anymore than she could. It had been too long; seven years since she'd needed him last. 

  
_Zack saw a light turn on in one of the second-story windows of the house he'd been parked in front of for the past day. The Fargo, North Dakota autumn night was chilly. Zack leaned forward, zooming in on it with his heightened, eagle-like vision. A teenaged girl was standing in the room, grabbing clothes from her closet and things off surfaces of tables in a panic, shoving them into a duffel bag. There were tears in her blue eyes, and as he watched they spilled down her cheeks and she wiped them away impatiently. Zack opened the door of the car and closed it noiselessly, hurrying across the darkened yard of the house to the front door. He kicked the door in and immediately picked up the sounds of footsteps walking over broken glass. He crept toward the kitchen and peered around the doorway, then quickly jerked his head back. Zack had been observing two men watching the house for the past week or so, since he'd arrived in the city, and now they had broken through the back door of the house and were headed for the stairs, guns drawn. _

"The parents are out," one of the men whispered to his colleague. 

"And she's onto us. We can't wait any longer. Come on, let's do this. And remember- Lydecker wants us to take her in alive." Zack heard his foot touch the first step and shot into the room, slamming into the first man and sending him tumbling to the floor, his gun sliding across the room and out of his reach. The second man yelled and shot at Zack, but the sixteen-year-old jumped out of the way, moving at sonic-speed, and kicked the man's gun out of his hand before he had a chance to react. By now the first man had scrambled to his discarded weapon, and he swept it up in his hand and held it on Zack. Slowly, already calculating his next move, Zack raised his hands to buy himself some time. The other man started to walk toward him, but suddenly crumpled to the ground, unconscious, as he was hit from behind with a baseball bat. Zack used this opportunity to overpower the other man, who'd been momentarily startled by the attack on his partner, which had seemingly come out of nowhere. Zack wrestled the gun from his hand and pointed it at him. 

"Down on the ground, now," Zack ordered. He complied and the fourteen-year-old girl from the window joined Zack. She dropped the baseball bat and he gave her a once-over, noting both that she seemed unharmed and that she'd grown a lot in the last few years. 

"You okay, Jondy?" he asked her, not taking his eyes off the man on the floor. 

"I'm fine," she said, looking at him with wide blue eyes filled with relief. "How did you know?" 

"It doesn't matter." He continued to hold the gun on the man. "Go get your stuff." Jondy nodded and ran up the stairs, returning a few moments later with the duffel bag. Zack, meanwhile, had tied the man's hands behind his back. Shoving the gun into the back of his belt, he led his sister out of the house. 

"Zack, it's good to see you," she said as they headed outside, touching his arm. He paused for a moment to give her the hug she wanted, then turned to the car and opened the passenger door. She climbed in, and he frowned as he heard sirens in the distance, moving closer. He turned to his sister and spoke through the open window. "You called the police?" 

"It was too late to call you," she said sheepishly as he slid into the driver's seat next to her. "I didn't see them watching the house until about a half-hour ago." She shook her head in annoyance at herself. "I let my guard down." 

"Never do that," Zack warned. "You were lucky I came. Don't let yourself get comfortable or bad things will happen to you. I might not be here next time." 

"I know," she said, looking away from him. He glanced over at her, his blue eyes full of worry and yes, love. 

"Jondy?" She turned back to him heavily. 

"Yes?" 

"It's good to see you, too." She smiled as he gunned the engine and pulled away from the sidewalk, tearing into the night, heading for Minnesota. He knew she'd be safe there. 

  
Zack shook the thoughts away, regretting that he'd left their reunion so long. The past didn't matter anymore; it was done and over and unchangeable. Tomorrow he would be in Santa Fe with both Jondy and Zane. That was what mattered now. 

"You're coming here?" Zane stared at Jondy as she spoke, a slow smile spreading over his shocked face. He jumped up from where he was sitting halfway up the stairs and bounded down them, grabbing the phone from her. Jondy was too happy to be annoyed. She grabbed Zane's hand and squeezed it in excitement. 

"Zack?" he asked breathlessly into the phone. 

"Hey, little brother," the answer came; it was the best sound Zane had ever heard in his life. 

"You okay, man? We've been so worried." 

"I'm fine, what about you?" 

"Great now that you've called. Where have you been?" There was a momentary pause. 

"It's a long story," he finally said. Zane sensed that he didn't want to talk about it on the phone, and let it go. He could wait a few more hours to hear it; he'd waited this long, after all. 

"Can I have the address there?" Zack; always to the point. Zane smiled to himself. 

"Sure. Of course." He didn't bother asking Zack if he had a pen, knowing that he would remember it. "We're at 763 Camino Del Este; it's off Hyde Park Road." 

"Thanks." There was silence for a moment. "Well, I have to catch some sleep. I'll be moving out early tomorrow morning." 

"Right," Zane said, smiling into the phone again. "It's good to hear your voice, Zack," he said, then added softly, "I love you, you know." 

"Yeah, yeah," Zack said, sounding embarrassed though the smile in his voice was obvious. Zane handed the telephone to his sister, who was gesturing wildly for him not to hang up. 

"Zack?" She didn't want to let him go in case this was a dream. "You're really coming?" 

"Of course," he said gently. "Don't worry, I'll see you soon." She nodded though he couldn't see it and swallowed hard. 

"I love you, Zack," she echoed Zane's words. 

"I'll see you tomorrow, Jondy." She smiled. 

"Right." Humour touched her voice. "Bye, Zack." 

"Bye." There was a click, and Jondy slowly hung up the phone. 

"He's really coming." Her voice was low, choked with happy tears. Zane nodded, and the two of them stood there for a moment, both digesting what had just happened. Jondy let her hand rest on the phone for a moment happily, then turned to him with tears in her eyes. "All this time... and then he's back," she continued softly. 

She felt like hugging someone, so she did. Zane chuckled and squeezed her tightly back, releasing her after a warm few moments. Jondy was saddened briefly as she looked at him, knowing that once Zack got here he would separate them, she knew. She didn't want to go; Zane was the best roommate she'd ever had, but more importantly he was the only sibling she'd seen since the escape besides Zack, and she didn't want to lose him now. Jondy stifled a sigh and concentrated on the thought of Zack being okay, and the good things his visit would bring. She had been hoping every day for this, she couldn't start complaining now that she'd finally gotten her wish. Zack was alive- what he decided for her and Zane was trivial compared to her happiness at that. 

"Well, I certainly can't sleep now," Zane announced. He reached out and touched Jondy's arm sympathetically. She looked at him; he seemed a little sad himself. Had he known what she was thinking? "I'll get us something to drink, okay?" 

"Thanks," she said absently as he turned and headed for the kitchen, Wenna at his heels. She glanced out the window; was it just her, or had the rain finally stopped? 

  
_"Maybe they won't make us train today," Ben said, smiling and sitting down next to Jondy with his tray of food. He motioned out the barred window at the rain by way of explanation. She smirked at him. _

"Yeah, right," she said, mixing a bit of her carbohydrate bar with her protein pudding and taking a bit. Not bad, _she thought, pleasantly surprised. _

"At least if we get soaked they'll let us take warm showers," Tinga said cheerfully from across from them. Jondy nodded and smiled at the thought of it. One of the things she detested most was having to shower under freezing water, but the guards seemed to think that cold showers built character. Maybe they were right, but she'd take warmth over character any day. She had loads of character, she figured, and being cold was no fun. 

  
"Here," Zane said as he reentered the room and handed her a beer. She took a sip of it, though she had never cared much for alcohol. Zane knew that, but the only other liquids in the house besides water was milk, which they mostly just kept around for emergency shortages of tryptophan. Neither of them really liked to drink it. 

"Do you think he'll tell us where the others are?" she asked Zane as he sat down on the sofa next to her. 

"No," he answered honestly. "You know how he feels about that." He put on a gruff voice. "'We're safer apart. Tactical separation cuts down the chances of Lydecker finding us.'" Jondy giggled and he paused. "And that's true, you know, it's not just Zack being Zack." 

"I know." She shrugged and smiled at him. "But it's a lot more fun being together." 

"Oh, definitely. But somehow I don't think having fun will be an acceptable excuse to Zack for us staying together all this time." 

"No," Jondy said softly as his words echoed her thoughts from before. "I suppose not." 

"He can't make us do anything," he said, and chuckled. "After all, as far as he complained to me last time I saw him, Max never listens to him. Why should we?" Zane smiled to himself; he hadn't been surprised when Zack had told him that; Max had always held her own feelings and those of her siblings over the objective, emotional instinct and curiosity over the mission. It was something Zane had always admired in his little sister, and something that he remembered had both annoyed and intrigued Zack. 

  
_Staccato sounds rang through the forest as Zane crawled on his belly through the trees, holding a machine gun over his folded arms. He could see Max flanking him and Zack up beside her, but he'd long ago lost sight of the three others with them, though he knew they had to be close, and Zack of course had tabs on them all. _

In the lead of the group as always, Zack held up a fist, the signal to stop, and Zane halted immediately. Zack motioned for them to head to his left, but Zane hesitated for a moment as he saw that Max wasn't responding. She was gazing at something; he followed where she was looking and caught sight of a odd, circular red object lodged in some branches high up in a tree. Up ahead, Max nudged Zack and he too caught sight of the strange object. Zane held his breath, waiting to see what he would do. After a moment Zack held up a hand in the signal to reassemble, and Zane headed over to where he and Max were, the others joining them as well. Zack listened to the staccato sounds for a moment, registered that they were farther away than they had been before, and got slowly to his feet, handing Zane his weapon to hold. He walked over to the tree and grabbed hold of the lowest branch, hauling himself up. Brin's eyes were sparkling; this was highly unusual- Zack never deviated from the mission, and Zane was similarly excited. 

The five of them watched him climb the tree, and saw him grab a piece of shiny string that the strange red object was attached to. He let himself fall the five metres out of the tree, landing on his feet, and walked over to them, holding the object, which was floating just next to his head. Zane stared at it, fascinated, as Zack handed the string to Max. She smiled at him, and then they all gathered around it, touching it half with awe and half with confusion, trying to figure out what it was. It had two words written on it in white letters: HAPPY BIRTHDAY. Zane didn't know what that meant, but he was more fascinated with the fact that he could see their reflections in its smooth, shiny surface. It appeared to be made of soft plastic, but it was hard to the touch; it seemed to be full of air. Zane had never seen anything like it in his life. 

"Section leader!" a harsh voice suddenly yelled at Zack; a guard came out of the trees toward them and they all whirled in fright. He headed for Max, reaching out to take the thing from her. She looked at him fearfully. "You will give me that contraband or return back to the training area-" But before he could finish, Zack ran forward between the guard and Max, kicking the man away from her hard. He went down, flying backward against a tree. Max looked from the man to Zack, but Zane was staring behind her, where he could see Lydecker looking at them through the trees, disappointment and anger etched on his face. Zane was frightened; Zack would surely go into solitary for what he'd just done. 

Slowly, turning to stare at the man they all feared, Max released the shiny string and watched the red thing float up into the sky until it was obscured by the trees. An odd feeling came over Zane and a lump caught in his throat as he watched it fly out of sight. 

  
Zane shook the memory away and took another sip of his drink. He heard Jondy sigh beside him. Zane knew she missed Max- all her siblings- just as he did. He watched the thoughts play across her beautiful face and wished he could erase the worry from her eyes. 

Jondy hated not knowing how many of her siblings had gotten out that night, or where they were now. She only knew that Jack and Eva were dead, Jace had been left behind, Max was alive, Zane was with her, and Zack was coming into Santa Fe to see them tomorrow. That left thirteen siblings who she hadn't seen in twelve years and who she had absolutely no idea about. She sighed and met her brother's dark, concerned eyes. 

"I just wish I knew where they were," she said to him. 

"So do I," he answered. Jondy looked down at her hands. 

"If I just knew how many there were out with us, and if they're alright... I mean, I thought Max was dead all these years, you know? I saw her slip below that ice..." 

  
_Jondy ran over logs, her bare feet freezing in the snow, but she knew it wouldn't really bother her for several hours. She passed the treeline and found herself overlooking the clearing Zack had told them to meet in. She picked her way down the slippery hill, seeing most of her siblings waiting for her behind two fallen logs. Catching sight of Max beside Zack at the log closest to Jondy, she headed in that direction and sat down next to her sister, clasping Max's hand in her own; the two girls shared a smile. The sounds of to helicopters that had been dispatched to capture them rang out over head, and Zack sprung instantly into action, jumping over the log to face them. They didn't have much time, she knew. He signalled them to get to the perimeter fence and as far away from here as fast as they could run. He didn't know what was beyond the fence anymore than they did, but logic told them all it had to be better than Manticore. _

Manticore was the place where they had all grown up, where they had been born and raised. It was the only place they had ever known. But one of the things that Manticore had taught them was that they should always know their enemy, but then Jack had been taken away because he was seizing. Zack had assured his siblings at the time that they would be making him better and then they'd return him to them, because he'd believed that. But Max snuck out that night and had seen him, dead and being dissected in the lab. She'd told Zack, Jondy knew, and then one night soon afterward Max herself had started seizing. 

It hadn't been a hard decision for Zack. He only had to look at the facts of the situation: a brother had been killed for shaking, and now a sister was shaking. A guard entered the room to drag her off just as they had done with Jack, so Zack attacked them, stopped them from taking Max away, and Eva had backed him up, grabbing one of the fallen guard's guns. Zack had been confused ever since Jack had been killed, not quite sure if Manticore was on their side or not, something he had never considered before that incident. But then Lydecker killed Eva during the escape, and everything changed. At that moment, while he and Jondy supported Max's convulsing form between them and Eva led them through the dark corridors, pointing a gun at the people approaching them, and when she fell to the ground by a single shot, Zack knew. He knew his enemy then, and that enemy was Manticore. So, he'd decided it was time to go. And they had followed him, of course. They would have followed him anywhere. 

Outside by the logs, Zack was pairing kids off and sending them in different directions, and out of Jondy's life forever, though she hadn't known it then. When he'd paired everyone else off and dispatched them, only Jondy and Max were left. He motioned for them to head south. She nodded and looked at Max, who shook her head; she wanted to stay with him. Jondy did too, but she knew that now was not a time to be arguing with one of Zack's orders. His expression made it obvious that he agreed as he glared at Max, repeating the signed order to head south more harshly this time. Jondy gave her sister a push; reluctantly, Max got to her feet, and they left Zack there alone by the log with the helicopters closing in on them. 

They ran through the snow together, Max just behind Jondy. They hit the perimeter fence and jumped onto it, climbing quickly toward the top. The metal was actually colder than the snow, if that was possible, put they pulled themselves up, knowing that getting over it meant their freedom from Manticore forever. They made it over, but Max suddenly stopped and stared fearfully behind them. Jondy looked, and her heart caught in her throat as she saw Zack on the other side of the fence, lying on the ground, convulsing. He'd been tasered, and he was surrounded by several guards, all with guns trained on his shaking form. 

With no hope of saving him, Jondy bit back her tears, grabbed her sister and kept running. She knew she had to get them to safety so Zack wouldn't have been recaptured for nothing; by his proximity to their position she was almost positive that he had to have been shot saving them. He would have never allowed himself to be captured otherwise. 

They just had to get a little further and they'd be out of range, safe. Jondy hurried along, but suddenly felt the ground shift and heard a sharp cracking sound from behind her. She whirled, terrified, and looked around for her sister. Nothing. Where was she? Jondy caught sight of a bit of cracked ice in the middle of the area they'd just run through, and hurried over to it, dropping down beside it. The water was still lapping at the sides of the ice; it had been broken only moments before. Her sister was definitely in there. 

"Max!" she called in desperation. No response. Suddenly she was blinded by white light from one of the helicopters overhead. Hesitating for only a second at the place where Max had fallen through the ice, Jondy turned and ran, the searchlight following her. She choked back her tears as she ran for her life and wondered if she was the now only one left. 

  
"And I never knew what happened to her," Jondy continued softly, shaking the painful memory away. "But now it turns out she's alive. I just wish I knew what happened to the others. Brin and Tinga... Ben, Krit..." She shook her head and sighed. "I just wish I knew if they were okay," she said. "You know?" She turned to her brother for a response, but a slow smile spread over her face as she took in the image of Zane sitting propped up against the pillows on the sofa beside her, his eyes closed, having amazingly managed not to spill his drink all over himself when he'd fallen asleep. Jondy reached over, took his drink and placed it on the coffee table. She picked up a blanket off one of the easy chairs and threw it over him. Wenna curled up in his lap, giving his hand a lick. Zane didn't stir; he was obviously exhausted. Jondy shook her head at him, rolling her eyes even as she gazed down at him lovingly. She switched the light on the endtable off and grabbed her novel, heading upstairs to her bedroom to finish it. 

  


* * *

Zane was snoozing in his bed the next morning, having moved sometime during the night without Jondy hearing. She'd been enthralled in her book; it had actually gotten rather good near the end, and with the excitement over Zack's impending visit, it had been a welcome distraction. Jondy went down to the kitchen and got some eggs out of the fridge, throwing them into a frying pan as she popped a few pieces of bread into the toaster. Wenna came downstairs and yipped at her; Jondy smiled at the puppy, in an incredibly good mood, and gave the dog her usual breakfast of boring generic dog food, with two strips of bacon thrown in just because. The rest she fried up in the pan, and they began to sizzle satisfyingly. Jondy looked outside; it was a sunny day for once. Things were starting to look up. 

"Where on Earth did you get fresh eggs?" Zane asked disbelievingly from the doorway, walking into the room and inhaling the scent of a great breakfast, practically salivating over it. She laughed at his dishevelled mop of tousled red hair and shrugged. 

"Farmer's market, special price. I've had them for a little while. I was saving them for a special occasion." Zane grabbed a chair from the little breakfast table and sat backwards on it. 

"Well, I guess this is a special occasion if anything is." 

"Definitely," Jondy said, flashing a grin at him. 

"You're in a good mood," he remarked, smiling. 

"The best," she agreed, setting a plate of eggs, bacon, and toast in front of him. He turned to dig into it hungrily, passing some of it down to Wenna, thinking Jondy couldn't see. She rolled her eyes, but shrugged and grabbed her own plate, sitting down next to her brother. They ate in satisfied silence for several minutes, lost in their own thoughts and the satisfying meal. Suddenly, Zane's fork clattered to the table and he stood up. 

Jondy frowned as she watched him, noticing the slight shake of his shoulders, which was quickly spreading over his whole body. He pulled a small plastic bottle down from the cupboard over the fridge; the pills inside rattled as his hands trembled and he struggled with the lid. Jondy got to her feet and opened it wordlessly. He shot her a grateful look, popped a few, and sat down heavily into his chair. Jondy grabbed a glass from another cupboard and filled it with milk, handing it to him. He drained it in a second, as well as the next two glasses she poured him. Then he was shaking too hard to hold the glass steady enough to drink, and he wouldn't let her do it. 

"Do you want to lie down?" 

"No, I'll be okay," he said, his words shaking because his teeth were chattering. 

"Are you sure?" 

"Eat your breakfast before it gets cold," he answered. She nodded after a moment, sat down across from him and continued eating with far less enthusiasm than before. She looked at him sympathetically, knowing how it felt to have a seizure but also knowing that he would just have to wait for it to wear off. 

"It's 11:30," she said by way of conversation. "Zack said he'd be here in the early afternoon. A couple of hours." 

"Yeah." Zane smiled tensely. "Can't wait." 

"Me either." There was a momentary pause; Zane's seizure wasn't slowing down. In fact, if anything, it was worsening. _The milk and pills should be taking the edge off,_ she thought, _and soon._ If they didn't within a few minutes, she knew, it meant they weren't working. _But they always work._ Her brow furrowed in worry. 

"... Jondy?" Zane's strained voice cut through her thoughts. 

"Sorry," she said, shaking her head to banish her concerns. "What?" 

"I said could you get me some more tryptophan, please?" 

"Of course." She stood quickly, grabbing the open bottle from the counter and spilling five or six of the pills onto the table. He scooped them up and downed them shakily. 

"Maybe I will lie down," Zane said tensely, getting slowly to his feet, leaning heavily on the table as he did so. He took a step toward the living room and almost fell over. Jondy quickly grabbed his arm, throwing it over his shoulder, and staggered into the living room with him, barely getting him onto the sofa. He was heavy. 

"The tryptophan should start working soon," she said when she'd laid a blanket on top of him and tucked it around him. He smiled uneasily up at her as his body continued to convulse. 

"Don't worry," he said. "I've had worse." 

"Do you want some more milk?" She started to stand. 

"No, it's okay, just stay here," he said. Jondy smiled down at her little brother and sat on the sofa beside him, taking one of his shaking hands in one of hers. She laid her other hand against his clammy forehead and frowned. His skin was freezing. 

  
_"It's okay, Zane," Jondy said softly, stroking his half-inch of reddish hair as she cradled theeight-year-old in her arms. It was the middle of the night, pitch black outside. Max sat next to them, holding Zane's limp hand gently as the boy convulsed on the bed. She looked up at Jondy worriedly. _

"Don't let them see me," Zane whispered as he shook. Max tucked the blanket closer around her brother's shoulders and glanced over at Zack, who was sleeping peacefully in his bed. 

"We won't," Jondy said, tightening her hands around Zane. 

"We should wake him," Max said. Jondy followed her gaze. 

"He'll just worry. There's nothing he can do that we're not already." A tear slipped down Zane's cheek, catching Max's attention. She reached down and wiped it away. 

"Don't worry," Max whispered to him. Jondy leaned down and laid her cheek against the boy's hair and starting making low, soothing sounds. She was humming, though they didn't know the word for it then. Her eight-year-old little-girl voice was melodic and beautiful as she sang softly to her brother. Max looked up at her in surprise. 

"What's that sound you're making?" she asked. 

"I don't know, but it'll make him feel better," Jondy answered, though she didn't quite know how she knew that. Max looked down at Zane, seeing that it was true: the boy's eyes had fluttered closed and though his body was still shaking uncontrollably he seemed more content that he'd been a moment before. Max smiled at Jondy and started to make similar sounds. There was no tune to it, as the girls had never heard music, but as they continued out of sync Zane appeared to calm slightly, and he fell asleep shortly, his seizure stopping soon afterward. 

  
Zane let out a long, shaky breath ending in a sigh as his body slowly settled down, his convulsions becoming less violent. 

"I'll warm up your breakfast," she said, starting to rise, but he shook his head. 

"No, I don't feel like eating." He let go of her hand and rubbed his temples. He'd almost completely stopped shaking now, to her immense relief. He turned onto his side, pulling the blanket tighter around himself. "I'm just going to take a nap, okay?" 

"Sure." She squeezed his shoulder. "I'll wake you when Zack gets here." He didn't answer her because he was already sleeping, exhausted from the seizure. She stood and walked over to the kitchen, setting his plate of food down for the dog. She felt like crying. Why did everything good always have to turn into something bad for them? Jondy stifled a sigh; wouldn't any event in their lives be just purely good? It seemed like they only ever got half-goods. _Oh well,_ she reminded herself, trying to be optimistic though it was hard sometimes. _A half-good is better than what we had back at Manticore._ She cleaned up the mess she'd made in the kitchen and glanced at the clock: 12:07. Zack would be here soon.


	4. Chapter 4

For pairings, rating, disclaimer, etc., please refer back to Chapter 1. 

  
RELEGARE IRA, REPERIRE CARITAS 

Zack rose at the crack of dawn and checked out of the little Red Mesa motel, grabbing a breakfast of potato chips and a chocolate bar from the lobby's vending machine. Outside, he climbed onto his motorcycle and looked at his watch. It was 0730 now and it would take him approximately eight hours to get to Santa Fe, setting his ETA at about 1500 hours. Right on time. Zack, pleased with his efficiency, gunned the engine of his motorcycle and rode off toward New Mexico. It was soothing driving through the uniquely-pretty Arizona landscape, with desert-like sandstone cliffs and scrub all around the endlessly stretching roads. 

Zack was on a mission... he rarely went anywhere or made any decisions without being on a mission. But really, this time, he had two. When he'd first heard that Jondy and Zane were staying together, he momentarily considered allowing them to continue to do so. Momentarily. Then he'd realized that though to the best of his knowledge Manticore and Lydecker were both gone, someone had been after Jondy in Texas _after_ the facility's destruction. Zack wanted to know who the hell would be looking for his sister, and if anyone else was in danger. Also at the back of his mind was what Max had told him, about others from Manticore being out in the world now. Zack intended to look out for them as well, but his twelve siblings came first, even though that wasn't very logical. Zack didn't care. He'd had the duty of protecting them for the last twelve years, and he wasn't about to let any new mission take precedence over it now. After Jondy told him everything she knew about the people who'd been following her, which Zack hoped was enough, he was going to send them to opposite sides of the country. He'd already set up a place for Jondy in Pennsylvania and one for Zane in California; all he had to do was get them there. If there was someone besides Lydecker looking for them now, then it was way too much of a operational security risk for them to stay together. 

Zack passed through the Santa Fe Section Three checkpoint at 1427 hours, ahead of schedule, and stopped someone to ask for directions to the Hyde Park area of the city. It was a region dominated by cul-de-sacs and very little traffic, with children playing in front yards, teenage girls watching them, and young men who stared at Zack's motorcycle with longing as he drove by. He found the dead-end road called Camino Del Este and stopped in front of the little house numbered 763. Removing his helmet, Zack slowly dismounted and took a huge breath as he walked up the front walk of the house. There were flowers growing in the front garden, and a leash tied to the mailbox. Zack shook his head as he realized Zane must have bought another dog since the last time they'd seen each other. He loved German Shepards; the rest of Zack's siblings had been traumatized by them so much in Manticore that they would never dream of owning one, but they'd never really seemed to bother Zane. 

  
Jondy flicked through the channels of daytime television, disgusted with most of it. She had been watching it since Zane fell asleep downstairs and, about twenty minutes before, the Eyes Only broadcast he'd told her about had come over the broadcast. Jondy had many questions for Zack. 

Over the blaring sound of the television, Jondy's heightened hearing picked up the sound of a roaring engine cutting out outside. She held her breath and slowly rose from the bed, moving to the window. A man was walking up the sidewalk of the little two-bedroom house; she couldn't tell who it was because she was above him, but his hair was dirty-blond, and he walked with purpose and determination. Zack. Jondy's heart caught in her throat as she turned and ran down the stairs, making it to the door just as the bell rang. Zane was still sleeping on the sofa. Jondy threw the front door open and he stood before her as though it was the most natural thing in the world, as though he hadn't just practically returned from the dead. Jondy gazed at him. 

  
_"Zack, get up." _

"I'm sleeping." 

"Get up, get up!" 

"Go away." 

"Zack..." 

"Jondy, go away already." 

"We're bored." 

"Go play with her, then." But Jondy didn't want to play with just Max; she wanted Zack to play with them, too. She climbed up onto his back and tickled him. Zack yelled in surprise and bolted upright, tumbling her onto the floor. She blinked, then just giggled at him; she knew he'd never hurt her. 

"You got him up!" Max was happy to see him awake, too. 

"Come play with us," Jondy said cheerfully. Zack tried to look annoyed, but she saw the loving smile in his eyes as he followed her over to Max's bed to play. 

  
Jondy sat next to Max behind the log in the forest outside Manticore. Before them, Zack was pairing her siblings off and sending them in different directions and out of her life forever. When he'd paired everyone else off and dispatched them, only Jondy and Max were left. He motioned for them to head south. She nodded, ready to obey, though she gazed at him sadly because she was afraid. She wanted him to come with them; there was no child left to pair off with- he could come with them, couldn't he? Max seemed to think so. But Zack just glared at Max, repeating the signed order to head south more harshly this time. Jondy stifled a sigh and gave her sister a push, and they left Zack there alone by the log with the helicopters closing in on him. Jondy's heart was pounding, afraid for herself, for Max, for Zack... for all of them. 

They ran through the snow together, Max just behind Jondy, their bare feet freezing. They hit the perimeter fence and jumped onto it, climbing quickly toward the barbed-wire top. It would mean their freedom from Manticore forever, if they could just get over it. And they did, but Max suddenly stopped and stared fearfully behind them. Jondy followed her gaze, and froze as she saw Zack on the other side of the fence, lying in the snow, convulsing with men all around him. Tasers were the only thing Jondy was more afraid of than the dogs. 

With no hope of saving him, Jondy bit back her tears painfully and grabbed her sister. They kept running. She knew she had to get them to safety so Zack wouldn't have been recaptured for nothing; by his proximity to their position she was almost positive that he had to have been shot saving them. He would have never allowed himself to be captured otherwise. He loved them so much, but sometimes she wished he didn't. 

"Down on the ground, now," he ordered. Jondy's eyes widened as she looked at the boy, the way he held his shoulders, the firm determined lines of his face, his blue eyes... 

"Zack?" she breathed, but he didn't hear her, his eyes fixed on the man, who slowly laid on the floor of the kitchen. Jondy joined her brother ecstatically, wanting to hug him but knowing it was not a good time. It had been five years, and now here he was, just in time to save her! She dropped the baseball bat and he turned to look at her. 

"You okay, Jondy?" he asked her, turning back to the man on the floor. She smiled. 

"I'm fine." Fine now, she thought. "How did you know?" 

"It doesn't matter." He continued to hold the gun on the man. Jondy supposed he was right. She'd been in trouble, now he was here, and she was safe. That was how it had always been, her whole life. It was the way it was; it didn't matter why. 

  
A shake in Jondy's voice as she spoke over the phone, ten years older than the last time he'd been with her but still sounding the same, "You're really coming?" The smile in her soft voice as she said it... he could almost see it. 

"Of course," he answered gently. "Don't worry." 

  
Zack stood in the doorway, a small smile on his lips, the blue eyes of the boy from her childhood gazing at her through time. Jondy stared at him; she felt like an child, in awe of a great work of art. 

"Can I come in?" he asked, humour touching his voice. Jondy was too happy to blush, but stepped back from the doorway. He entered the house and looked around as she closed the door behind him. He turned back to her. "Nice place." 

Jondy couldn't wait another second. She threw herself at him, catching him off-guard as he stumbled slightly. He chuckled and brought his arms up to encircle her slight form; she clutched his shoulders as though they were a lifeline. They could have stayed that way for two days and Jondy wouldn't have cared, but Zack released her after a few moments and kicked his shoes off. 

"Where's Zane?" he asked. Jondy motioned to the living room and led him there, heading to the sofa and shaking her little brother awake. He stretched and yawned, looked up at her, slightly irritated. Then he caught sight of Zack behind her and practically fell of the sofa before standing up, grinning, and rushing over to him. Zack held out a hand, put Zane ignored it and hugged his brother tightly. Zack rolled his eyes over his brother's shoulder, but it was obvious to Jondy that he was enjoying their reunion almost as much as she and Zane were. 

"What the hell are you doing sleeping in the middle of the day?" Zack asked with amusement once Zane had let him breathe again. He crashed into an easy chair and Jondy joined Zane on the sofa across from him. "Don't you have a job?" 

"Yeah," Jondy said pointedly. "Don't you have a job?" Jondy worked nights, as always- three a week. Zane started to protest, then shrugged his shoulders. 

"What I want to know is where you've been, Zack," he told their brother. Jondy was instantly all ears as they both waited expectantly for Zack to speak, but he sat there for a moment, just gazing back at them. Then he stood and walked over to the window. "How long have you been living here?" 

"Zack-" Jondy began; he turned back to them. She recognized that mission-look in his eyes. 

"About seven months," Zane answered. Zack nodded, crossed the room to the phone, picked it up and listened for a moment, then set it down and crouched on the floor, examining one of their wall sockets. His siblings watched him for a moment, and Jondy leaned over to her brother. 

"Has he gone insane?" she whispered to Zane. 

"That's not funny," he said. Then Jondy remembered the Eyes Only broadcast and winced; she hadn't meant that. 

"Do you have a screwdriver?" Zack asked. Zane, not missing a beat, motioned to the hall closet. Zack walked over and searched it, then came back and removed the screws from the outlet. His body was blocking Jondy's view, but she couldn't even begin to imagine what he was doing. After a moment, though, she heard a sigh and stood with Zane, walking over to him. The outlet was now removed from its box, and Jondy could see a tiny, strange piece of metal that looked somewhat like a large computer chip stuck on the inside of it. 

"What is that?" she asked, leaning down next to Zack to get a better look. 

"I bought it on the way into town," he said; Jondy looked at him strangely as he rose to his feet and made a motion like writing. Zane motioned to where the phone was, and he grabbed a piece of paper, scribbling on it. "It's nice, isn't it?" he asked, showing them the paper. SAY YES, it said. THE HOUSE IS BUGGED. 

"It's great," Zane said. 

"Yeah." Jondy slowly got to her own feet and swallowed hard. Zack walked over to the window and parted the blinds, staring out at the normal-looking street with suspicion. He turned back to them and made several hand signals. They nodded. 

"Well, now that you're here I think I'll go out and get us some beer," Jondy said, as per his instruction. 

"I'll go with you," Zack agreed. "You can show me around the place. Zack turned to Zane and made a few more hand signals of direction, and when he nodded he and Jondy turned and left the house, climbing into Zane's truck and pulling out of the driveway. 

Zane stood there for a moment, then slowly headed upstairs calmly to his bedroom, grabbing a few things he wanted to keep and packing them into a duffel bag. He headed into Jondy's bedroom, throwing the few things he knew she wouldn't want to part with into the bag, then headed back downstairs and grabbed the bottle of tryptophan from the cupboard. He headed for the door and pulled on his shoes. Something brushed up against his leg and he jumped, then looked down sadly at Wenna. 

  
_"Do not attempt to adjust your set. This is a streaming freedom video bulletin." Zane ignored the television and continued to work on the carburetor in front of him. He didn't see why most mechanic shops he'd worked in had to have a televison blaring all the time. It always annoyed him. He liked to work on his cars in peace and quiet, fully absorbed. _

"This cable hack is being beamed to you right across America," the television continued. "It cannot be traced, it cannot be stopped. This is a message to those known as X5." Zane's hand froze on the carburetor. He couldn't have hear that right. He slowly turned to the television and his heart caught in his throat as he saw the Manticore chimera symbol on the screen, with the X5 written over top of it. "You've been compromised," the voice seared into him as five barcodes scrolled across the screen: Tinga's..... He dropped the wrench he'd been holding and it clattered to the floor. "You're in danger," it continued. "You know what to do." 

"Hey, uh, Zane, hand me that 3/ 16th, will ya?" He heard Jamie, his coworker, say from underneath the truck he was working on. Zane ignored him as he stared at the television. 

"I repeat: you've been compromised," the voice of the eyes said. Zane turned and left the shop. 

"Zane?" the call came again. He kept walking. 

"You know what to do," he heard the voice as he climbed into his truck parked outside. 

"Zane?" he heard Jamie call once more. 

"This message will repeat..." he heard, just as he tore away from the mechanic shop in his truck. He glanced at the clock as he headed home to get some stuff before he left Hollywood. His place was only a short drive from where he worked, and he was there momentarily. Zane's heart caught in his throat as he saw his building surrounded by police, their car-lights flashing. He sped past the apartment block and toward the checkpoint to leave city, finding that all he could think about was his old dog Kia. Poor girl; he loved that dog. He'd had her for years. But he couldn't go back for her now. It might already be too late to get out of the checkpoint. Still, though... he loved that dog. 

  
"I'm sorry, girl," he said softly to Wenna as he pulled open the door. She whined from behind him. _Don't look at her, don't look at her,_ he told himself, knowing he'd be lost if he did. Then suddenly, he found himself looking at her. Her little puppy-face stared up at him with love and sadness at being left behind. 

"Oh, hell," he said, grabbing one of her leashes from the closet and snapping it onto her collar. "Let's go for a walk!" he said, getting her all excited. Her tail slapped against the wall. Zane smiled and led her outside, not bothering to lock the door. He thought briefly about leaving her with some neighbours, but he knew that would be way too obvious to whoever was watching him. _Besides,_ he thought belatedly. _The neighbours could be the ones watching me._ Zack and Jondy had driven off in his truck, and he was supposed to take Zack's motorcycle. But you can't take a little puppy on a motorcycle, and he wasn't going to leave her on the streets to starve. Zane ignored the bike and headed down the street with Wenna trotting happily at his side. He walked ten blocks and stole a car out of someone's screened driveway and drove it to the motel where Zack had said they should meet, intending to take one quick detour before meeting his brother and sister there. 

  
Zane showed up at the motel in Albuquerque three hours later, after having discarded the car and dropped Wenna off at an animal shelter. At least her chances of getting a good home would increase there; Zane knew that if Zack knew he'd risked op-sec for a dog he'd get a serious reprimand, so he didn't tell his brother what he'd done. 

"Were you followed?" Zack asked when he entered the room. Jondy smiled up at him, relieved, from the motel room's single chair. 

"No," Zane said, sitting down on one of the beds. 

"Okay, good." Zack relaxed slightly. Zane noticed that Jondy was wearing a brand new set of clothes and he assumed that Zack had driven his truck into a lake, switching it for the '03 blue sedan that Zane had noticed parked in front of their room. That would mean that now they were now almost definitely free of listening devices, but Zane had really liked his truck. 

"Okay," Zack said, going back to business immediately as though they hadn't just fled their home and taken refuge in a disgusting little motel, uncertain of where they would go next. Then it occurred to Zane that Zack likely knew exactly where they would go next; he just wished that his brother would share that information. The shabby motel room had two single beds in it, and there was another single in an adjoining room that Zack had rented for her sister, though she didn't sleep. Jondy brought her knees up and hugged them to her chest. "Tell me exactly what you remember about the people after you in Austin," Zack continued. 

"There isn't a lot to tell," she said apologetically. He waited. "I was in Austin, had been for about three months, and I started to notice these guys following me. At first I thought I was imagining things, because they were pretty sneaky about it, you know? But then they started showing up where I work, and I saw them parked outside my apartment one night, too. I had called you about a week after I first started seeing them, but you didn't come." She looked over at him apologetically, as it was obvious her words had hurt him slightly. "I tracked Zane down in Kansas and he came over and got me. We've been staying in Santa Fe ever since then, waiting for you. Sorry I can't tell you more." She narrowed her eyes in confusion. "It was weird though, because I'd heard earlier that Manticore was gone. I don't know who it could have been, unless Lydecker decided to keep chasing us even after all his funding was gone..." Jondy trailed off, shrugging. 

"Lydecker's gone," he told her. "Presumed dead. He disappeared." 

"Great," Zane said, smiling. There was no love lost between Lydecker and Zack's siblings. "But then who was chasing Jondy?" Zack thought for a moment; he was confused, frustrated. 

"Max never told me anything about anyone else being after us after she saw Manticore burn down," he muttered. Zane and Jondy perked up at the mention of their littlest sister's name. 

"Max?" Jondy asked excitedly. "When were you with her?" 

"Not too long ago," Zack answered distractedly. 

"Where?" 

"In-" He paused. "Well, it doesn't matter where. But she told me all about Manticore being burned down, the others getting out..." he looked at his surprised siblings. "You didn't know that?" 

"I knew Manticore was gone but I'd heard that almost everyone died in the fire." 

"Max said she got everybody out," Zack answered. Slowly, Jondy smiled. 

"She was always such a good sister," she said softly. Zack allowed a short pause before he got the conversation back on track. 

"Look, the point is that someone was looking to take you in after Manticore and Lydecker were gone. That worries me." That was quite obvious to Jondy and Zane; it worried them, too. 

"What are you going to do?" Zane asked. 

"Well, I'll have to track them down, won't I?" Zack said heavily. "We don't want these people running around." He sighed. "But first I'm calling Max. I don't think she told me everything." 

"Max?" Jondy's eyes were glowing; Zane grinned. "You're phoning Max now?" Zack hesitated for a moment, but he didn't see how he could avoid it. 

"You have to let us talk to her," Zane said. Zack really didn't like the idea of that; Max was a rogue, and he a hard time keeping her away from the rest of her siblings once she found out anything about them. He hadn't been able to prevent her from meeting up with Tinga, Ben, Brin, Krit, Syl... and three of those siblings had hurt her deeply. He didn't want that to happen again. He wanted everybody safe and everybody happy, in that order. But that meant that he had to keep everybody apart. And Max was always a security risk in that department. 

"Zack, you can't just call her and not let us speak to her, that's ridiculous!" Jondy was right; it was ridiculous. _Besides,_ he reasoned with himself. _They won't know where she is because I'll dial the number, and we'll be out of here tomorrow. What harm could it do?_ It was when he started thinking like this, Zack knew, that he was getting weak. He shook his head, disgusted with himself, but picked up the phone and nodded over to Jondy. She almost clapped her hands in excitement as he dialled the number without letting her see. Zane was grinning. 

  
Max sat on the sofa of her little run-down apartment, Original Cindy cooking them a late dinner in the kitchen. She was gazing out the window at the rain, wondering if it ever stopped. It seemed to be raining every day in Seattle. The telephone rang and Original Cindy grabbed it off the wall. 

"Hello?" she said absent-mindedly, checking the stew on the stove-top to make sure it was bubbling properly. It actually didn't smell half-bad. 

"Where's Max?" a curt voice came over the phone. Cindy paused, then turned slowly to her roommate, holding out the phone. 

"It's for you, boo," she said. Max glanced up, not feeling like taking on any missions from Logan just now. 

"Who is it?" 

"Zack," Cindy said. "I think." Max hurried over and took the phone from her. 

"Hello?" 

"Max," he answered. She smiled into the phone. 

"Zack. Where are you?" 

"Doesn't matter. Listen, I need to talk to you about-" His voice suddenly cut off, alarming Max. 

"Max?" a woman's excited voice asked over the line. 

"Who is this?" Max asked warily. "Where's Zack?" 

"Max, it's me." Tears shook in the girl's voice. "Jondy." 

  
_Max sat with Jondy on her bed, playing one of the games they'd made up that Max found out were strange only after she got out into the Real World. They didn't speak, but used hand signals in the game, as they did in missions, instead. Every so often, one of them would giggle at a particularly fun part of the game. Jondy smiled at Max, her blue eyes sparkling with happiness and love._

  
Max sat down hard in one of the chairs; Cindy looked at her worriedly, but she just stared ahead of her with a slow smile spreading over her face. 

"Jondy?" she whispered. Cindy's eyes widened; she'd heard loads about Jondy. "Max!" her voice came, shaking with happy tears. Max brought a slow hand up to her mouth in shock and happiness. 

"Jondy," she breathed again. "How- how did you... Jondy..." 

"It's so good to hear your voice, Max," she said. "How are you?" 

"Fabulous," Max said. "Zack let you call me? I'm shocked." 

"We had to convince him." There was a smile in Jondy's voice. 

"We?" 

"Yeah. Me and Zane." 

"Zane's with you?" Max clutched the phone; this was getting better and better. There was a muffled sound on the phone for a moment, and then a male voice spoke over the line. 

"Hey, Maxie," he said. A tear slipped down her face. 

"Zane... is that really you?" 

  
_"I like them," Zane's happy voice said of the dogs Max and Zack were looking at out the window. Zack turned and Max gazed at her brother from where she rested in Zack's arms. His half-inch of red hair and cheerfully-displayed teeth caught the moonlight and glowed. Max smiled at him. _

"You like everything, Zane," Zack said. Max had to agree; Zane was an easy-going child. 

"Well, I like dogs most of all," he told them, then turned away from the window. "Brin wants us to come and see the picture she drew with those crayons the nurse gave her yesterday." Max smiled, jumping down from Zack's arms and followed their brother back to the barracks. 

  
"Yeah, it's me." He chuckled. "Hang on, I'm going to put the phone on speaker." There was a click and his voice started echoing slightly. 

"Tell us how you've been, Max," he said. 

"Yeah, but don't tell them where you live," Zack's mutter came over the line. Max smiled and filled them in on what she was doing while giving as little details as possible, which was actually more difficult than one would have thought. Zane and Jondy gave her information, too, and they could tell her more because it didn't matter if she knew where they were or had been; they would be moving out in the morning anyway, to who-knew-where. Finally, Zack took the phone off speaker and asked Max to explain to him exactly what had happened since Manticore burned down. Max, sensing that he was on a mission and didn't want her to waste time, immediately told him about the night Manticore was destroyed, Joshua and the children she helped get into Canada. She told him about White and his objective to kill the escapees in order to erase all evidence that Manticore ever existed, what Renfro had said when she died about Joshua's 'father,' what White had told her about her own lack of junk DNA, and the memory she'd had of Sandeman picking her up and calling her his 'special little one.' 

"I don't remember any Sandeman." There was a frown in Zack's voice. 

"I was six," she said. "I can't exactly remember what you were doing at the time." 

"I would have been eight. Where the hell was I when you were with him?" It actually annoyed Zack that at some point fifteen years ago he hadn't been watching his sister. She smiled into the phone. 

"Don't worry, Zack," she said with amusement. 

"I don't understand this White stuff, but if he's trying to kill us then he'll have to be eliminated." 

"That could be a little more difficult than you think," Max said hesitantly, then told him about what she'd only recently discovered, that White and his men were members of some strange millennia-old breeding program to create super-fighters even better than Manticore-made soldiers. _(Please see the Author's Note at the end of the chapter.)_

"Better than us?" He sounded almost offended by the thought, but there was deep worry in his voice as well. 

"Yeah," she answered. There was a pause, and then she could practically see him shaking his head in determination. 

"It's gotta be done," he said. 

"Just be careful," she told him softly. She heard the smile in his voice. 

"Don't worry, Max." In the motel room, he glanced at his expectant siblings. "I guess you should say goodbye to them before we hang up." 

"Yeah," Max said, smiling. "Put one of 'em on." There was silence for a few moments. 

"Hey, Maxie." 

"Zane." She sighed, knowing that she might not talk to him for years after this, if ever. She swallowed back her tears, but he heard them in her voice anyway. 

"Don't cry," he said gently. "I'm glad you're okay." 

"Me too," she said, and swallowed hard. "I'll see you, right?" 

"Definitely," he answered, though she knew he wasn't any more sure than he was. 

"Zane?" she asked after a moment, feeling stupid but wanting to know something. He waited. "What... what do you look like? Do you still have red hair?" 

"Yeah," he said. "What about you, do you still have those big brown eyes?" 

"Yes." Max started crying. "Zane, I love you." 

"I love you too, Maxie," he whispered, then handed the phone off to his sister. 

"Max, I wanted to tell you..." She took a shaky breath. "That I'm sorry. For leaving you behind. I wanted to save you, but I couldn't see you. The water was dark and they were coming..." She swallowed hard. "I'm sorry, Max." 

"I'm just glad you got out," Max said. "I was so afraid you didn't make it." She heard her sister crying softly. "Jondy, do you remember all the nights we played together?" 

"Yes..." 

"You were always there for me. You always understood me. I've missed you." 

"I've missed you too, Maxie," she said softly. "I love you." 

"I love you, Jondy." Max wiped the tears from her cheeks, not wanting her sister to hang up. Even Cindy's eyes were blurred, and she'd only heard half the conversation. A moment later there was a click on the other end of the line, and Max breathed a long sigh. She held the phone to her ear for a good few minutes before she let Cindy take it from her and hang it up. 

  
In Albuquerque, Jondy took a shaky breath and leaned back in her chair. Zane sat on his bed, staring silently at the floor. 

"What's she like?" he asked Zack after a moment. "Is she still sensitive?" 

"Yeah," Zack said. Zane nodded, then raised his head to look up at him. 

"Did she have a good childhood?" 

  
_Zack was twelve years old, staying in Sheridan, Wyoming, with a kindly elderly couple who'd taken him in because he done some odd jobs for them and let it slip that he was homeless. Zack was reading, curled up on their sofa in the front room. He glanced out the window at their neighbours across the street, two little girls, one ten one thirteen, playing in the leaves they had spent the last hour raking. Zack watched as the younger girl grinned at her foster sister and took a flying leap into the pile, her thick, dark hair, only a few inches long, sticking up in all directions from her head. Her brown eyes danced with happiness and Zack was glad to see his sister so happy. The front door of her house opened and her foster father came out, gesturing at them angrily. He motioned for Max to rake the leaves back up, and took the other girl, Lucy, inside with him. Zack watched his sister's reaction to the man and frowned._

  
"Relatively," Zack answered after a short pause. 

"I bet she's beautiful," Jondy said softly. 

"Of course she is." Zack was slightly uncomfortable with this conversation. "We all are." 

"Right," Jondy said, her voice mildly bitter. "I forgot." She hesitated, then looked at him squarely. "What about the others? Where are they?" Zack had their undivided attention; he felt like squirming under their gazes. 

"All over the place." 

"Tell us about them, please. Something." Jondy's voice was so hopeful. "Anything. How many are there?" 

"Ten besides you two." He didn't see how that would be a security risk. They digested this for a moment. 

"What are they doing?" Zane asked. "Do any of them have kids?" Jondy perked up at this question; she loved babies, Zane knew. Zack stared into space for a moment. 

  
_Zack entered quietly through the open window of the apartment's living room, having climbed down from the roof. He moved through the place, opening a drawer or two to see how things were going financially for his sister. Then he headed down the hallway, past the bedroom she shared with her husband, and into the nursery. He frowned as he saw her standing there, holding her child in her arms, feeding it from a bottle. It was one of the stupidest things she could have done, get married, have a baby. At least she'd called to tell him that it was born, though he noticed she hadn't called before that. Zack knew she'd been married, but not that she was trying to get pregnant. If he had... well, maybe that's why she hadn't called till after the birth. But a baby would only tie her down to one place, and she didn't need that. Zack cleared his throat and Tinga whirled on him suddenly, frightened. She relaxed when she saw it was him and calmed the fussing child in her arms, who'd been startled by her sudden movement. Zack shook his head at her in disappointment. He shouldn't have been able to sneak up on her like that. _

"You let your guard down, Tinga," he said to her. She smiled, walked over to him. She moved the blanket away from the child's face to show it to him and Zack gazed down at it emotionlessly. 

"Want to hold him?" she asked sweetly. Her face was glowing; it annoyed Zack. 

"No." 

"Do it anyway, I have to get his changing stuff out." She handed the child to Zack despite his protests, and the bottle with it; the baby looked like it was about to cry so Zack rocked it slightly, calming it down. Tinga looked over and smiled softly at him. 

"So, having fourteen little brothers and sisters actually did teach you something," she remarked with humour in her voice. He frowned at her momentarily, then shrugged. 

"I used to hold Jondy and Max a lot when they were babies," he told her, putting the bottle in the child's mouth. "You know, they didn't sleep much." 

"You were only a toddler when they were babies," Tinga said as she searched for the diapers in the changing table. She sounded surprised. "The nurses let you look after them?" 

"I guess so," he said, shrugging. "I remember, anyway." He looked down at the baby in his arms, watched his little lips work around the nipple of the bottle, his tiny fingers coiling in the blanket he was wrapped in, the contented look on his face as he ate. Oh hell, _Zack thought as he suddenly realized he loved the boy. Why did he have to love him? He handed the baby back to Tinga quickly. _

"Where's Charlie?"_ He tried not to spit the name. Tinga paused momentarily, but let it go. _

"Visiting his sister in Arizona," she answered, laying the baby down in the crib. She hugged Zack in a belated greeting. He gazed down at the baby for a moment. 

"That was a mistake, you know." 

"Is thirteen so much harder than twelve?" she asked; he looked up at her. 

"That's not the point, Tinga." 

"Really?" She smiled at him. "I thought it was." That annoyed Zack, but it annoyed her more that she'd left the baby in the crib without anything covering him. He really wanted to leave without covering him, really _wanted to, but he couldn't seem to move his feet before he'd tucked a sheet and blanket over the infant. Then he rolled his eyes with disgust at himself and went into the living room to reprimand his sister._

  
"Yeah," he said softly, answering Zane's question. "Tinga. A son." Zane smiled. 

"How old?" Jondy asked. Zack thought about this for a moment. 

"Six or seven now." 

"Is he gorgeous?" she asked. Zack made a noise that sounded vaguely like agreement. 

"She must be so happy," Jondy said softly. Zack looked away. 

  
_Zack and Tinga drove in silence all the way to the Canadian border; finally he couldn't stand it anymore and glanced over at his sister. _

"What's wrong?" he asked. She looked at him, shrugged. 

"So that was Max," she said. "I was just thinking how much she's grown." Zack shook his head. 

"No you weren't." Tinga glanced away, heaved a sigh. "How old is he now... four?" 

"Five," Tinga said, a smile touching her lips. 

"You'll miss him. And... the other one." 

"You can say husband, Zack," Tinga said, staring at him. "Of course I'll miss them." 

"You did the right thing," he said. "You'll all be much better off now." 

"Yeah..." She didn't sound convinced. "I guess so." 

"I don't have a place lined up for you yet, but we can stay in a motel for a couple of days until I find somewhere." He glanced at her. "Anywhere you'd like to live particularly?" 

"And then you'll leave..." she said, ignoring his question and gazing at him. "Right?" Zack gripped the steering wheel. 

"That's right." 

"And I'll be alone." 

"It's better this way." 

"For who?" she asked angrily. "You?" 

"Tinga," he warned, not feeling up to getting angry. "We've gotten you over the border, you're not going back. That's suicide." Zack words dissolved into a loud yawn. He hadn't slept properly in months, hadn't been able to in Manticore what with all they'd done to him. He brought a hand up and rubbed his temples, then pulled the car off to the side of the road. The anger in Tinga's voice fell away for a moment to be replaced with concern as she gazed at him thoughtfully. 

"You don't look so good, Zack." 

"No kidding," he said bitterly. "I want you to drive now, okay?" If he stayed at the wheel he might get them both killed. "I need to get some sleep." 

"Why don't we stop for the night?" Tinga asked. 

"No, we're just over the border. It's not safe yet, they'll be looking for us here." Tinga stared out the window as cars passed them; it had started snowing. The soft flakes touched against the road in the darkness and her breath fogged the window. 

"Okay," she said, turning back to him. "I'll drive." Zack gazed at her; there was something strange in her voice. 

"Thanks," he said. She got out of the car and he slid into the passenger seat as she climbed in beside him, taking the wheel. He dropped the reclining seat back a bit and crossed his arms over his chest as she started the car, closing his eyes. 

When he woke up the car was parked on the side of the road, its hazard lights on and the heat blasting, a blanket laid over him. Tinga was nowhere to be found. He'd cursed her in his head even as he'd headed back to Portland to save her again, and the boy, whom he loved but really _didn't want to._

  
"Where are they?" Jondy asked him, breaking him out of his reverie. He glanced at her, cleared his throat, spoke hesitantly. 

"He's in Canada." There was a momentary pause from the others at this. 

"Tinga's not with him?" Zane asked cautiously. 

  
_Zack glared at Max and Logan, kissing in the middle of Logan's floor. He'd just witnessed an incredibly sappy conversation that he would have really liked to have erased from his memory, and this was even more disgusting. Thankfully, Max saw him and pulled away from Logan. _

"You want to go rescue Tinga, or has something more urgent come up?" He heard Logan let out an annoyed breath and watched smugly as Max helped him into his wheelchair and then leaned against the computer desk. Zack walked over to her. 

"Got some info from a pencil-pusher inside Manticore," he told his sister. "Same guy that told me about Tinga." 

"Where is she?" Max asked, all-ears now. 

"There's a research facility they've set up inside a converted silo near the municipal border," he said. "Pretty sure that's where they got her." Actually, he was positive that's where they had her. Max looked at him. 

"When do you want to do it?" she asked. Zack glanced between Max and Logan for a moment, then decided that sooner rather than later was the way to go for more than one reason. 

"Tonight," he said. Max stifled a sigh and waved him away. Rather than be annoyed, Zack left the room readily, knowing that she would leave Logan to follow him. 

  
Zack crouched with Max outside the silo and pulled a gun out of his bag, holding it out to her. She looked at it; he knew she hated guns because of what happened to Eva, but it would be stupid not to carry one just in case, and he didn't want her being stupid. This had to go off without a hitch. It was risky enough as it was without her going in there unarmed. 

"Take it, Max," he said firmly. "We don't know how much muscle they got in there." 

"I'm not going to use it," she said, not making a move to take it. 

"Take it!" he said, pressing it into her hand. "I'll go up front and you see what you can find on the other side." He looked at her for a moment where she was staring down at the weapon in her hands, waiting for some sort of recognition that he'd spoken. After a moment she nodded slightly, and he moved out. He hurried down to the front of the silo; some of the security personnel were converging on his position, but he was ready. 

"I'm down front, Max," he told her over the comm he was wearing. "Close in." He turned and started shooting the men approaching him, throwing open the doors to the silo. He fired, striking three of the four men on the other side, but the fourth landed a hit and caught him in the leg. He grunted in pain and shot him, then collapsed back against the outside wall. 

"Max? Zack?" Logan's worried voice came over the comm suddenly. He'd been watching via the hacked feed off a Chinese spy satellite to monitor the outside, and now he sounded concerned. "Max, Zack, full military convoy." Zack bit down a curse. 

"I'm hit," he announced. 

"Get out of there," Logan said. Zack rolled his eyes at the man; of course he was on it. He just had to find Max. He tried to shoot his way inside, but there were too many men and his leg was useless, a dead weight at his side. He caught sight of Max down by where they were holding Tinga, gazing at her sister where she hung suspended in some strange liquid, what Zack didn't know. His heart caught in his throat as he saw with his heightened vision Tinga's limp form floating there. Her skin was a clammy white, her body was limp... she was dead. Zack had failed Tinga, and now he had to get out here before he was dead and no use to Max. He just hoped she had the sense to get herself the hell out of there. 

  
Zack entered the DNA lab with Max, strangely in awe as he gazed around at the countless vials of DNA, each with its own unique barcode. He walked over to the X5 section and stretched his fingers out, his eyes narrowing as he examined first one half-filled tube of green liquid, then another. 

"Max, it's you," he said, laying his hand against the one whose barcode read 332960073452. He moved to another, 330417291599. "And me..." He touched 331280315734. "And Brin..." Lastly, he laid his fingers on the glowing barcode that read 331450074656. "And Tinga." 

"No," Max's firm voice came from behind him. He turned to her. "Tinga's dead." 

  
"I don't want to talk about it," he told his brother and sister. Jondy's hands started shaking. 

"What about Syl, is she out?" 

"Yes." 

"Safe?" 

"Yes." Both Jondy and Zane breathed a sigh of relief at this.v "Krit?" Zane asked. 

"He got out," Zack said. "He's fine." 

"What about Ben?" Jondy asked with fear in her voice. 

  
_"I couldn't tell you." Max was crying. "I didn't know how you'd react. I wished you could have been there with me, Zack. Together we could have gotten him out of there. I should have tried. But I couldn't. I was so scared. He begged me. His eyes..." _

"Max, what happened?" he asked softly, not knowing if he really wanted to hear. Slowly, through her tears, Max related the entire awful story to him. Ben had murdered people, had been so lost, and Zack hadn't been there for him. He' failed him. But worst off all, she'd had to stop Ben herself. Zack should have been there! He should have killed him, and then maybe Max wouldn't feel like she was to blame for what happened to their brother. Ben... he'd loved Max so much, and she'd loved him. He used to make shadow shows on the walls for her when she couldn't sleep. Ben... but that child was gone now. 

"I'm sorry," Max whispered. "I'm so sorry." Don't be sorry, _Zack willed her, cradling her gently in his arms._ It's not your fault, it's mine. It's all my fault. _She cried into his shoulder as his own tears fell._

  
Zack closed his eyes briefly. 

"I don't want to talk about it," he repeated. Jondy stood up, her eyes flashing with pain and anger. 

"I want to know, Zack," she said shakily. 

"Jondy," Zane warned gently. She turned to him disbelievingly. 

"I want to know!" she said again. She turned from Zane to Zack as her tears fell; they were both just sitting there, saying nothing, Zane with sympathy in his eyes and Zack with pain. 

"I think it's time we all got some sleep," Zane said softly. Zack stood up from his bed and all but stomped into the bathroom, closing the door behind him. Jondy stared at the closed door for several moments, then slowly turned to her little brother. He looked angry. 

"Now look what you did," he muttered. 

"Don't you want to know?" she asked shakily, wiping at her tears angrily. 

"Of course I want to know," he said, a little more harshly than he'd intended. "Just give it some time." 

"We don't have time!" Jondy cried, dropping her voice slightly. "You know he's going to split us up the first chance he gets." Zane glanced away from her. 

"I know," he said. "But can't you see how much this is hurting him?" Jondy glared at her brother. 

"I just want to know where they are, I'm not blaming him!" she yelled. Zane stood up and jerked a finger at her angrily. 

"He's blaming him, though!" he yelled back. "Can't you see that?" Jondy swallowed back her tears, not looking at Zane. After a moment of standing there, not knowing quite what to do, she turned toward the door. 

"I'm going to bed," she threw over her shoulder as she opened the door. Zane opened his mouth to apologize, but she left quickly, slamming the door behind her. He sighed and sank back down on his bed, putting his hands over his face. That hadn't gone well at all. He rolled over as the bathroom door opened. Zack stood there and looked at him uncomfortably, not meeting his eyes. Zane switched off the lamp on the small table next to his head, and Zack got into his own bed. Zane closed his eyes, willing sleep to overtake him so he wouldn't have to lie in this uncomfortable silence anymore. 

Then finally, just as he was drifting off, there was a loud thump from behind his head, where Jondy's room was. Zack bolted upright in bed, listening. Zane assumed that Jondy was just throwing something against the wall in frustration, though she didn't usually have temper tantrums. Zack seemed to think it was something else, however; Zane could see his big brother's eyes narrowed through the darkness. There was nothing for several minutes, but as Zack started to relax again several short popping sounds broke through the silence of the night and a bullet ripped through the wall above Zane's bed, shattering the full-length mirror that was hanging on the opposite wall. Zack shot out of his bed and Zane threw off his own blankets, bolting with his brother for Jondy's room. 

  
Author's Note: I know that all that stuff about White and the freaky breeding program happened post-Some Assembly Required, and that my story sorta follows SAR as though all of the subsequent episodes never happened... but just ignore that little idiosyncrasy, okay? Cause it's important to me to have Max tell him about that weirdness with White, so yeah... just ignore it if it bugs you. Hopefully it won't too much!


	5. Chapter 5

For pairings, rating, disclaimer, etc., please refer back to Chapter 1. 

  
RELEGARE IRA, REPERIRE CARITAS 

Zack slammed against the door to Jondy's room; it was locked. He slammed against it again with his shoulder, then kicked it in. Jondy was holding a gun on three men, four more lying on the ground around her. She whirled on her brothers, thinking they were more attackers, and one of the men jumped on her and wrestled the gun from her hand. Zack launched himself at him, and Zane and Jondy took down the other two. There was a crash and the stomping of feet as more men, about a dozen, entered the room, shooting staccato shots from their machine guns at the three X5s. Jondy and Zane dodged the blows and Zack ran around behind them and grabbed a gun up from one of them, shoving it into his back and pulling the trigger. Jondy and Zane had their hands full, and Zack held the gun out, trying to pick some of their attackers off. But his siblings were moving far too quickly and he didn't want to risk catching one of them with a stray bullet. He watched for a moment, impressed, as his brother and sister took out man after man until there were only two left standing. Jondy turned momentarily to Zack and her eyes widened at something just behind him. 

Zack whirled, but too late as a body slammed into him, whacking the gun from his hands. It slid across the floor and out of his reach as the man choked him; Zack couldn't believe he'd let himself be cornered like that. He brought a leg up and kicked the guy hard, catching him off-guard for a moment, and deposited him on the floor. Another one attacked, and Zack dispatched that one as well, and the next, as his siblings did the same across the room. He liked being up against the wall like this; no one could sneak up behind him. He heard a yell of pain from across the room that sounded like Zane and glanced up worriedly; at that moment, one of the men rushed at him and shoved him against the wall, holding a handgun against his chest. He pulled the trigger, but Zack moved out of the way at lightening speed first, deflecting the man's hand and sending the bullet into his thigh instead. Zack grunted in pain and sank slowly to the floor, leaving a sickening trail of blood behind. 

"Zack!" Jondy screamed, levelling her own gun to shoot at the two men surrounding her brother. She hit one in the chest and he went down, but his partner managed to land a shot of his own in Jondy's shoulder. Then he grabbed the heavy oak bookcase that was against the wall and tipped it onto Zack's crumpled form. Zane ran forward from the other direction and quickly took him out from behind with a chair. Jondy fell to the floor, clutching her shoulder, pain shooting up and down her arm. Zane dropped the chair he was holding and looked at his two siblings lying on the floor. He headed over to the fallen bookcase and shot Jondy a concerned look as he struggled with it. 

"I'm fine, get Zack," she said quickly. Zane nodded and slowly eased the heavy piece of furniture off his brother, throwing it out of the way. What he saw made his heart stand still. 

Zack lay on the floor, the clothes covering his leg soaked with dark blood, likewise his face a bloody mess, and his eyes closed. Zane knelt down, holding his breath and praying that his brother was only unconscious. He touched his neck and felt the lightest of pulses. Jondy joined him and gasped at what she saw, clapping a hand over her mouth. 

"We have to call an ambulance," he said. 

"Won't they expect us to go to a hospital?" Jondy asked; she didn't quite know what to do, just that she had to do it fast. Zane looked at her. 

"You're in charge." 

"I- what?" 

"You're in charge Jondy. Second-in-command," he said. There was a tense silence for several seconds, then she swallowed hard and nodded, searching back to her Field Med training at Manticore. 

"Put pressure on the wound," she said. Zane nodded, put his hands over Zack's leg; they immediately became red with blood. 

"Looks like his femoral artery is severed," he said tensely, remembering back to his training as well. "He's bleeding pretty badly." Jondy made a decision. 

"I'm calling an ambulance," she announced. Zane nodded, looking relieved. She turned and ran to the phone, keeping the gun with her in case there were any more people looking to attack them. 

Zane watched Jondy pick the phone up, quickly dialling 911 and waiting impatiently for someone to answer. His hands slipped slightly on Zack's leg from all the blood, so he redoubled his effort and applied more pressure to the bullet-hole. He heard a groan from beside him and looked down at Zack. His eyes were open. 

"Zack?" he asked; his brother's eyes struggled to focus, but failed. 

"What the hell happened?" he asked weakly. "Are you and Jondy okay?" 

"We're fine," Zane assured him. He nodded, then brought a hand up to clutch his head, wincing as waves of pain hit him from the movement. He looked like he was about to pass out. 

"They'll be back," he forced out. 

"It's okay, we're leaving," Jondy said, rejoining them and sitting down next to Zack. "I called an ambulance." Zack's eyes widened. 

"That's exactly what they want us to do!" He shook his head at her and cried out in pain again. 

"Stop moving," Zane told him worriedly. "Just lie still, let us deal with this." 

"You called an ambulance?" Zack asked. Jondy nodded. "Then they know where I am. Go, leave a gun with me and go right now, before White's men come back." 

"No, Zack, we're going with you to the hospital," Jondy protested; Zane nodded his agreement. 

"Look in my jacket- there are two addresses in there. I've already set up apartments for you on the east and west coasts. It's all ready, all you have to do is go." Jondy looked away; so, he was intending to split them up. Somewhere in the back of her mind she'd hoped that he would understand. "Just take them," Zack continued in a strained voice. He was forcing himself to stay conscious. "Take them and get the hell out of here. Now." 

"I won't," Jondy told him. Zane sat there and didn't say anything either way; he was following Jondy's lead. She was in charge and it scared her. Zack looked like he wanted to throw something but he was too weak to do it. 

"This is not a discussion," he bit out. "I'm giving you an order, Jondy." Her eyes blurred with tears and she touched a hand to her brother's clammy forehead. Zane looked down at his own hands, covered in Zack's blood. He'd lost so much... where the hell was that ambulance? 

"I'm sorry, Zack," Jondy said. "I'm going to have to disobey that order." Zack stared at her, and she saw countless emotions playing through his eyes: disappointment, frustration, sadness, panic, love... then his eyes hardened into rage. He opened his mouth to say something, but the pain hit him again and he cried out. 

"Stay still!" Zane said, alarmed. Zack's teeth started chattering dangerously and his body shook slightly. Jondy swallowed hard. 

"Please don't tell me you're having a seizure now," she said. Zack fixed his eyes on her with some difficulty. 

"No, I'm going into shock," he said, struggling not to pass out as his entire body shivered, the movements likely causing a lot of pain. Jondy hurried over to one of the beds and grabbed a blanket, putting it over Zack's body, and used the chair Zane had hit one of the men with to prop Zack's legs up. She did it as gently as possible; still, though, he cried out in pain and a few tears slipped down his cheeks. _Where is that ambulance?_ she wondered in desperation. _It seems like we've been waiting hours!_ Zack's breathing became slightly laboured and he swallowed a few times, looking nauseous. 

"I'm thirsty," he said. 

"I'll get you some water." Jondy started to slowly rise to her feet. 

"Okay, just hurry up about it!" Zack was anxious; he closed his eyes briefly. His skin was cold, pale, almost bluish. "Sorry," he said. She ran into the bathroom, poured a glass of water, sat back down beside him. Zack lifted his head slightly to drink some, but had to drop it back down to the floor almost immediately as he very nearly passed out from the pain that single movement caused. Jondy looked worriedly at Zane, who was keeping his hand over the wound as blood continued to pour out of it, feeling useless. A moment later, he heard sirens approaching from a distance. Jondy and Zack also heard, and Jondy breathed a long sigh of relief. 

  
"We're got a gunshot would to the leg, heavy bleeding. Looks like the femoral artery's been severed," one of the three paramedics surrounding Zack yelled as he was pushed on a wheeled bed through the emergency room corridors. "What's his pressure?" he barked. Zack's eyes were opening and closing as he drifted in and out of consciousness. 

"BP's 60 and falling," another one answered. "We're going to need some blood. Get on the phone with the donor bank." She turned to Jondy and Zane. "Do you know his type?" 

"It's mine," Jondy said immediately. The doctor looked relieved. She nodded at a nurse next to the bed. 

"Set her up. We're going to need at least three units." She looked back down at Zack. "Blood pressure's still falling, let's get him to the OR _now."_ Jondy and Zane hurried along beside the bed, worry etched into their features. They saw a pair of doors stating NO ENTRY BEYOND THIS POINT up ahead. Jondy started to slow down. 

"We'll be here when you wake up, Zack," she told him. His eyes struggled to focus on her. 

"No, Jondy," he managed. They pushed him through the door. "Get out of here!" he called with a terribly strained voice as he was wheeled down the hall. "Get the hell out of New Mexico right now!" Jondy and Zane stood stiffly in the corridor as the doors slapped shut behind him. Slowly, she turned to her brother; he was gazing sadly at her, waiting expectantly. 

"I'm not leaving," she said firmly, walking past him and sinking down into one of the uncomfortable hard plastic waiting room chairs. He sat next to her, nodded. The nurse came and asked Jondy some quick questions, then finally hooked her up to an IV so she could take her blood into the OR for Zack. Jondy sat there with Zane for what seemed like days but was really hours, waiting. Every so often Zane would fall asleep, and every so often Jondy would start crying. She couldn't lose Zack now; not when she'd just found him again. And she didn't want to lose Zane either; she just wished her big brother just understand that... 

  
    _That's a beautiful drawing, Brin. _

    What do you see? 

    We didn't go to the High Place tonight. 

    Come play with us! 

    Go to bed, Ben. 

    Yours is nicer than mine. 

    Put him in solitary. 

    I heard the nurses talking about souls again today. 

    Don't worry. 

    It's in the genes. 

    They'll take him to the Bad Place and drink his blood. 

    We're good soldiers. 

  
A red balloon, the murmurs in the night of sisters who never slept, a breeze through the forest outside Manticore, Zane's cheerful grin, a child laughing, _I love you, Zack. _

  


    We can't let them see her like this. 

    If this was a real mission you'd be court-marshalled and discharged for what you just did! 

    We're not little anymore. 

    I saw Jack... Ben was right. He was in the Bad Place. 

    There is no 'I' in team. 

    I'll protect you. You don't have to worry. 

    They're scary. 

    Only the best soldiers get to go to the Good Place. 

    You know what happened to Jack. 

    What do you have to say for yourself, soldier? 

    Do you ever think about the Blue Lady? 

    I'll take care of you, Maxie. 

  
Bright lights, the staccato sounds of machine guns, Jack shaking on the floor, the patter of rain on a window, the nomlies in the basement, dogs barking, _Tell us a story, Ben. _

  


    That was a mistake, you know. 

    Where's Eva? 

    That's not the point, Tinga. 

    You're a good brother, Zack. 

    I shouldn't have given her that order. She wasn't ready. 

    You? You're Zack? Why didn't you tell me? 

    It's my responsibility to look after all of them. 

    Is she still sensitive? 

    It's better this way. 

  
The screen flashing DUTY, Eva falling dead to the floor, the darkness of the solitary confinement box, the windows crashing as they ran away, _I won't let anyone hurt you, Maxie. _

  


    For the record, I don't like this. 

    Is it because I haven't been a good little soldier and followed orders? 

    I died for you! 

    We're together right now; that's all that matters. 

    I was the only one who knew! 

    Show me your barcode. 

    Zack, don't go, please. 

    How can you love him and not me? 

    I'm not going to let them do to Tinga what they did to Brin. 

    We're here, baby sister. 

    Zack, it's me. It's Max. 

    How could I forget... a single thing about you? 

    Tinga's dead. 

    Zack, you came for me. 

    We can't stay together, Max. 

    Even I have my moments of weakness. 

    I don't want to die. Please... don't let me die. 

    X5-599, I've got a heart for you. 

    I'm so sorry. 

  
Slowly, Zack's eyes fluttered open and he focussed on the hospital room around him. His eyes narrowed; he had to get out of here, and fast. They would have certainly tested his blood, maybe even seen his barcode. This was enemy territory for sure, and he had to leave as soon as possible. But there was just one problem: Zack was extremely weak, and if he got up and started moving around he would likely rip the stitches that had just been put into him. Slowly, testing to make sure the pain wasn't blinding when he did it, Zack turned his head to examine the rest of his surroundings. His mouth almost dropped open in fury as he saw Zane sitting in a chair next to his bed, fast asleep. 

"Hey!" he yelled, startling his brother awake, who smiled at him and leaned forward. Oh well, Zack thought, half angry and half touched, though he would never admit it. _At least Jondy had the sense to get herself out of here._ He looked at Zane. "What the hell do you think-" 

"Zack, you're awake," Jondy's happy voice came from the doorway. Zack gaped at her disbelievingly as she crossed to Zane's side of the bed. 

"I told you to get the hell out of New Mexico," he growled. 

"Court-marshal me," she said humourlessly, then smiled slightly, dropping into a chair beside Zane. "Besides, you should be thanking me. That's my blood you got in there." She gestured to bag of blood on the IV stand next to his bed. "I actually slept for a couple of hours last night after they took a few units." 

"She did," Zane agreed. "It was weird. Jondy... quiet." She prodded him in the ribs. 

"How's your shoulder?" Zack asked her. 

"It's fine, they cleaned me all up." 

"What time is it?" he asked. 

"4:00," Zane said, smiling. "Almost dinner time." Jondy rolled her eyes at him but Zane ignored her and continued, "You've been here all night." Zack sighed tensely. 

"Look, you know White's men are going to come looking for us here. I'm surprised they haven't already." Zack slowly pushed himself to a sitting position and waited for the sense of vertigo to go away. It took a long time. "And I'm sure those doctors must have tested my blood, and yours Jondy, if you donated to me. We have to leave, now." 

"Hold on, Zack, you're in no condition to be moving around," Zane said, pushing him back against the bed. Zack glared at him but relented, lying there for a few moments, fighting down nausea. 

"I hate hospitals, I hate doctors, and I hate that you didn't listen to me," he ground out. His brother and sister smiled at him. 

"We know," Jondy said, annoying him. 

"This is what we're going to do," Zack told them. "We're going to wait a few hours, until I can stand up, and then we're going to split up." He pointed at Jondy. "You're going to go to Pennsylvania." He looked at Zane. "And you're going to go to California. End of discussion, no objections, that's it. Got it?" 

"Got it," Zane said softly. Jondy stifled a sigh. 

"What's the harm in-" 

"I don't want to have this conversation, Jondy," Zack cut her off. 

"But what's the harm-" she tried again. 

"The harm is that White has now tried to kill you several times, you let your guard down, he put listening devices in your house and you didn't even know it, and Zane led them to the motel. The harm is that you're still in very real danger and you won't even follow my orders anymore. That's the harm, Jondy!" She looked away from him, tears blurring her eyes at his harsh words. Zane sighed deeply. 

"Don't be so cold, man," he said to Zack. His brother glared at him. 

"This isn't about being warm and fuzzy, this is about safety. Your safety. You've already disobeyed my orders twice today. You'd better listen this time if you know what's good for you." 

"Is that a threat?" Jondy asked icily. Zack glared at her, said nothing. Zane touched his sister's shoulder. 

"Come on, let's go get something to eat." Jondy stood and followed Zane to the door, not taking her eyes off Zack. She glanced outside before leaving the room, seeing a window-washing crew tending to the windows of the neighbouring building. Her eyes narrowed in confusion and she stopped Zane as she saw one of the crew ignoring the windows and doing something with his hands on the platform. What's he doing? she wondered suspiciously. Jondy zoomed in on them with her heightened vision, and her eyes suddenly widened as she saw him stand up, holding a bomb detonation device. Her heart caught in her throat. 

"Zack, the crew outside!" she yelled, more calmly than she felt. He snapped his head to look at them, fighting off dizziness as he did so. He saw what she saw and sprung into action, throwing his blankets off and pulling the needle out of his arm, abandoning the hospital bed and hurrying over to them, adrenaline keeping him on his feet. Zane supported Zack out of the room as Jondy grabbed his clothes from the beside cupboard. Then she turned and ran lightening-quick from the room to join her brothers, just before it exploded. They used the panic and distraction of the other people on the floor to jump unnoticed into an elevator. Zack pulled on his clothes as they descended to the first floor, wincing at almost every movement but not complaining. It was lucky X5s had a high tolerance for pain, or they might not have been able to get out of there in time. 

By the time the doors parted, Zack looked like a regular person and not a patient; they exited the elevator and headed for the front, but halted suddenly as they saw a military blockade set up around the hospital. Zack's eyes narrowed as he led them quickly into an inner, windowless room and shut the door. The first floor had been evacuated; it was deserted. 

"What do we do?" Zane asked. Zack made several hand signals, instructing them to split up. Zane would head east, Jondy west, and Zack would go south. They were to call him once they were safe and then they could head to the coasts. Zane looked terribly saddened at this, but didn't protest. Jondy stared at Zack as he gave his orders, tears threatening. 

  
_Jondy sat next to Max behind the log in the forest outside Manticore. Before them, Zack was pairing her siblings off and sending them in different directions and out of her life forever. She watched them run off into the dark forest, one after the other, but she was happy that Zack let her stay with Max, her closest sister... Then Max fell through the ice, and Jondy was all alone. For twelve years, she never saw any of the others who escaped that night. She still didn't know where most of them were, or if they were alive. And Max... Zack had split them all up. Max had objected; if only Jondy had too, then maybe things would have been different._

  
Jondy swallowed hard as Zack turned to her. 

"I didn't see them," he said softly. "I owe you one, Jondy." 

"Then I'm calling in the debt," she said immediately. "Let us stay together." 

Zack heaved a breath, shook his head. 

"No, it's too dangerous. That's non-negotiable, Jondy." 

"Can't you understand?" she whispered bitterly. 

"Jondy, that isn't the point," he ground out. "Look, I know what's best for you, okay?" 

"How the hell do you figure that? You haven't seen me in ten years, Zack!" 

"I know what's best for you!" he repeated in a yell, infuriated at having his authority challenged. "We move out, now." 

"No." Jondy crossed her arms over her chest angrily. "I'm not splitting up again." 

"We don't have time for this!" 

"Then you'd better listen to me, Zack!" 

"Look," he tried to appease her. "I promise that when we get out of here I'll let you two see each other, just to say goodbye. Okay?" The words had come out before he'd realized what he was going to say. Jondy considered this for a moment; if he let them see each other one more time, then she could try again to convince him not to split them up... she looked at him with slight suspicion, surprised that he would make such a promise. 

"You swear?" she asked; Zack wished he could take it back, but he never took his word back. And he knew what that meant, what he would have to do now. He stifled a sigh. 

"I said it, didn't I?" he said heavily. 

"That's good enough for me," Zane said. After a moment, Jondy nodded her agreement. 

"Okay," Zack said. _Finally._ "You know what to do. Let's move out." He shot Jondy a brief look of concern; she would be going out the most dangerous way, something she knew Zack would have liked to have done. But he was too badly injured; he'd never make it. Jondy nodded at him in reassurance, and they exited the little room, her two brothers splitting up without a word and heading in opposite directions. Jondy took a breath as she watched them disappear, and then headed for the door that would take her out into the crossfire. 

She crept through a side alley and stopped at the first vehicle she saw, picking the lock and sliding across into the driver's seat. The military blockade was across the street, and a few of the men were standing around, talking and joking amongst themselves. Jondy rolled her eyes, leaned down so she couldn't be seen and started to hot-wire it. After a few moments, it started. She rose in her seat, smiling, but her smile fell away when she glanced out the window to make sure she hadn't been seen and found herself looking straight at the end of a sem-automatic machine gun. The man holding it tapped it against the glass. 

"Get out of the car," he said slowly. Heart racing, Jondy unlocked the door, seeing two men standing behind the first one, also with machine guns trained on her. Surely more would be there soon; she had only once chance to gain the upper hand. She started to slowly open the door, then slammed it into the first man, catching him off-guard and pushing him backward into the men behind him. Jondy kicked him in the head before he could regain his feet, and grabbed his gun, holding it on the other two. They backed away slightly, but more men came around from the other side of her and made a half-circle in front of her. Two dozen little pinpoints of red lit up her forehead and chest. She froze for a moment, then brought the gun up a half-inch. They immediately began firing, but she was faster; she launched herself into the air, dodging their shots, and let off some fire in a wide arc of her own, felling several of them. They regrouped, firing again, and she ran at them lightening-quick, kicking several of them as she continued to shoot. Her gun made clicking sounds, out of bullets, so she hit one of the upside the head with it. She glanced around; twenty-five men laid on the ground around her, some dead, some injured, some scared. Jondy smiled, satisfied, and backed away toward the alley for a smooth escape. But she suddenly picked up a short series of clicks from behind her as many guns were readied, and she froze. 

Jondy turned slowly, dreading what she would see. Seven men looked back at her, weapons drawn. She was out of bullets. Jondy turned slowly; there were eight closing in on her from the other side now. Little red points of imminent death lighted her entire body. She dropped her useless weapon to the ground and slowly raised her hands into the air. One of the men smirked at her. 

"No use surrendering," he said in a cruel voice. "We don't want you alive." Jondy wracked her brain, tried to think of a way of escape, _something_ to help herself. But the only thought that came to her mind was that she'd never been so frightened in her entire life, and she wished she'd gotten to see Max just one more time. 

  
Zane looked at his watch, wondering where Zack was and just hoping he was okay. It had been three hours since Zane had lost White's men and called the contact number, asking his brother to meet him at a Chinese teahouse near the Arizona state line. He'd been sipping tea for almost that entire time, and the servers were starting to look at him strangely. Zane could care less; all he wanted was to see his brother and sister walk through the door. A moment later, he got his wish. Or, at least, half of it. Zack; alone. He stood slowly. 

Zack had driven across the city to see Zane as fast as possible, his heart heavy, and had stopped the car he'd stolen at the hospital by the Chinese teahouse Zane had asked him to, parking it just before the checkpoint to leave the state. He'd gotten out slowly and walked over to the little teahouse, the pleasant aroma hitting him as he stepped inside. He'd surveyed the interior and located the table he was looking for across the room, and had saw Zane quickly stand up, dread in his eyes. 

Zack walked over and dropped into the chair across from him. Zane watched him expectantly, waiting; slowly, Zack shook his head. His little brother looked horrified, and Zack thought for a moment that Zane might throw up. But instead, a few tears slipped down the young man's cheeks, though he didn't seem to notice. He ran his hands slowly through his red hair disbelievingly as he looked at Zack, waiting for him to say that it was all a cruel joke. But Zack looked dead serious, pained. Zane's hands were shaking. 

"It's not safe here," Zack told him gently, pushing a slip of paper across the table to him. Zane picked it up and stared at the address of the apartment Zack had set up for him in Long Beach, California. "You should move out now. Take my car, it's just outside." 

"How-" Zane searched his brother's face for the answers he already knew but didn't want to. He tried again. "How did..." Zane swallowed hard as Zack looked away. 

"I'm sorry," he said, his voice barely there. He couldn't meet his little brother's eyes. Through tears, Zane nodded disbelievingly and got slowly to his feet, dropping a few bills automatically on the table. Zack stood up as well and pulled his shocked brother into his arms. He could feel Zane's shoulders shaking slightly with suppressed sobs. 

"I'm sorry," Zack said again, holding his brother tightly, trying unsuccessfully to swallow the lump in his throat. He released Zane after a few moments and gazed at his brother sadly. _Please understand,_ he willed him silently. But Zane only gazed at him through his tears, his dark eyes anguished, and slowly turned back to the table. 

He picked up his jacket and pulled it on robotlike, not really thinking about his actions. Zack followed him out of the teahouse and, with a weak smile that didn't meet his eyes, his little brother climbed into Zack's car and started it, heading for the checkpoint that would take him out of New Mexico. _Please understand,_ he thought again as he watched the car drive out of sight. _It was the only way it could have happened._ Then he shoved his hands into his pockets heavily and headed in the other direction. The sky was pitch-black, cold. _How appropriate,_ Zack thought bitterly as he walked along. After almost an hour, he wiped the tears that had fallen from his eyes and entered a little restaurant-come-café, gazing around it hollowly, emotionlessly, not knowing if he could do this. 

Suddenly, someone grabbed his arm. He whirled, ready to strike whoever it was, but Jondy just looked up at him with concern. She was expectant, saddened, afraid. Her face was bruised from the fight with White's men, which she would never had escaped from if he hadn't shown up just in time. Zack closed his eyes briefly at the thought; he'd come so close to losing another sibling... but this time he'd managed to avert the terrible event. This time. 

Zack felt Jondy touch his arm, her blue eyes waiting in fear as she pulled him back to the present. Taking a deep breath, he shook his head slowly, his heart breaking as he saw the shock and anguish pass through her eyes. He wanted this to stop; he didn't know if he could take it again. _Please, Jondy,_ he begged her wordlessly. _Please don't make me force you._

"No." Jondy took a step back from him as though he'd struck her, shaking her head. Tears blurred her vision; she repeated in a shaky whisper, "No, you're wrong." 

"I'm sorry, Jondy," he said softly. 

"I want to see him." She was sobbing now; her hands were shaking. 

"White's men were already there." She fell back against the wall. He reached out but she slapped his hand away angrily. 

"Jondy-" 

"No!" She stared at him; he looked away from her, a few tears slipping down his own cheeks. She hugged him. "Zane..." she whispered through her sobs. "No, Zack please." People looked at them curiously from their tables but Zack glared at them. 

"I'm sorry," he repeated in a whisper, holding her tightly. "I'm so sorry." 

"Maybe if I had listened to you, then this wouldn't have..." Jondy shook her head at herself. "God, I was so stupid." 

"No, it's not your fault," he told her firmly, making her look at him. "Don't ever think that." 

"It's not your fault either," she managed to whisper. _You're a good brother, Zack,_ her little-girl voice came back to him. _It's not your fault._ He shook it away. 

"No," Zack said, his voice dripping with bitterness. "Of course not." He pointed to the parking lot outside. "Now get a car and go to Pennsylvania." She nodded slowly, but he took no pleasure in her compliance. She hugged him again, sobbing slightly into his shoulder. He didn't want to let her go. _Jondy, my baby sister, please understand... You wouldn't listen._ She released him, gazed up at him, her face the same as it was when she was a child but her blue eyes so troubled now. She'd seen so much, gone through so much... _and I didn't save you._ Ten years. God, he'd left this way too long. What was wrong with him? But now he _had_ saved her, only she would hate him if she knew how... Zack shook the thoughts away, touched her shoulder and fought back tears. 

"Go," he said firmly, his voice shaking slightly. "Just go." She nodded slowly, turned, and walked away into the starless night. He watched her go, wishing it could have gone another way. But everything he did in his life was for them, and he knew that no decision was without consequences; if the consequences of this decision had to be lifelong guilt for him, he'd take it. They were safe, and that was what mattered. Safety was top priority, he knew that. But the look in Jondy and Zane's eyes... well, he just wished that for once it could be easier on all of them. Just once, that it didn't have to be so hard to do the right thing, what was best for them. 

And sometimes, though Zack hated to admit it, he wondered if maybe Tinga had been right about what she'd said on the road into Canada that night... When they'd escaped, he'd paired them all off, sent them off into the world, just hoping that they would be okay until he could find them again, and he was the only one without a partner. He was alone, so he could save them, fend off the guards until the bitter end without putting anyone else at risk. And then, when he'd finally found them again, he split them all up, telling himself it was a tactical decision. But now, for the first time in his life, he wondered if maybe there had been another reason for it, too. 

  
_"And then you'll leave..." Tinga's pained words came back to him. She turned in the car to gaze at him as snow started to fall outside the windows. "Right?" Zack gripped the steering wheel hard and continued up the Canadian highway. _

"That's right." 

"And I'll be alone." 

"It's better this way." 

"For who?" she asked angrily. "You?" 

  
Zack looked up to where Jondy had stood moments before, then turned away heavily. _Please understand,_ he thought again. _It was the only way it could have happened..._ He hesitated. A tiny voice asked him, _But then why did doing it feel so wrong?_ Zack stopped walking and looked up at the starless sky, but it held no answers for him; he felt himself shiver slightly though it wasn't very cold. Like the night of the escape, he was alone. They all were. And now, twelve years later, he wondered for the first time what good being alone had done any of them, and who his decision had really been best for. 

  
Author's Note: I hope you didn't see the Jondy being alive thing coming... if you did then I suck at twists, sorry, but I tried my best! Hopefully it was sad even if you did see it coming. I was sad when I wrote it. Poor Zack... he just doesn't get it. :) 

Author's Note #2: There is a sequel up to this now if you're interested. Just click on my name and it's called "Ante Officium." Thank you for reading and please review if you liked it! :)


End file.
